I’m not even ON your fucking lawn, calm down!

I mean, you’re by no means wrong, but...

Go blame the Boomer generation that perpetually infantilized their children and children’s children while simultaneously burdening them with crushing guilt for allowing themselves to be infantilized until their default assumption is that they must be failures at the basic responsibilities of modern life every time…

All these shit-ass clickbait articles on Facebook titled “[cute animal] trying/accomplishing [thing] is all of us,” or “this [noun] is everything.” No! No, the fuck it is not.

“Adulting.”

Usually said right after, this is not the time to talk about gun control, which also needs to die.

“Thoughts and prayers”

I would add using a noun as a verb. The only example I can think of is the Hulu slogan of “Come TV with Us”. That shit is getting annoying.

Well, with Fredrick Douglas stealing the limelight...

“Satan’s plan was working.”

I’d go for expatriation way before I ever considered moving to flyover country

The article is also bad writing.

I tend to eat at restaurants based on how nice the chef is.

I read a story awhile back that he was pretty obnoxious on-set (lots of gay and sex jokes), but everything else I’ve read about him makes it seem like he’s a good dude.

Jesus this article makes me feel old. It took me like five paragraphs to figure out that Offset was a person. I’m going to go yell at some kids to make me feel better.

It’s Time to Live a Private and Personal Life By Eliminating All Social Media Because You Individually Are Not All That Important and No One Really Cares What You Just Ate or Where You Went on Vacation Especially That One Girl From High School Who Got Hot in College and You Casually Check Up On Her but You Realize…

Dan seems to ignore that that beautiful sunset was due to horrific wildfires going on in the area.

Did they have to use so much flesh?