How can you say the craftsmanship of shoes from Guangzhou are less desirable than those from Shenzhen or Tianjin?!?!

“Many of our store associates and guests have asked for this.” 

I guess Whitehead was just asking for it, dressing up like that all slutty like.

Well, what difference does that make? Anyone willing to throw someone they know that well under the bus probably isn’t a great friend. A troubled family member used my identity to sign up for utilities because they had destroyed their credit and then proceeded to default on a couple grand worth of bills.

The fact that he was falsely accused of a crime is just further proof that Whitehead isn’t Cowboys material.

I would speak English to everyone BUT him. For him, it would be “goble dee pofti armar!” IF he noticed, he would be so confused and it would be fun for everyone else.

The funny thing is that I read the handholding as Macron treating him like a small child who needs to be guided across the road.

Or maybe it was an EU version of “Impractical Jokers”. I can hear Merkel cackling into the earpiece, “Keep holding his hand! Don’t let it go - even if he tries! Now look into his eyes like you like him!”

Haberman, Baker, and Schmidt are remarkable journalists if only because they seem to be able to follow along enough to keep a conversation going and refrain from saying, “What the fuck does that even MEAN?!?!” after everything he says.

He also thinks Akie Abe doesn’t speak English.

That fun little nugget was absolutely the most terrifying part for me...like this man thinks we’re all up in arms over $12/month insurance? Can we uh...please have $12/month insurance that appreciates over time?

If I had to sit next to Trump at a state dinner, I’d pretend I didn’t speak English too. And if he knew I spoke English, I’d pretend to be deaf in the ear next to him. Self-preservation.

Or,

The vibe I got off that whole trip to Paris thing was that Macron doing some sort of “Dinner for Schmucks” dare with the rest of the EU leadership.

It’s at least a bit easier to swallow with the Russian dressing.

Chinese will be more useful when she’s running the Sweatshops.

There is so much to unpack from the fact he sat next to Abe for several hours at dinner and has no idea she speaks English 7 days later.

Dude. Marcon is “holding your hand” because he’s trying to get you to keep your pervy hands off his wife.  

People don’t realize he loves holding my hand. And that’s good, as far as that goes.

“ I know the bad people. Believe me, do I know bad people.”