Take her to the theater and buy 2 tickets to Sing. Then accidentally walk into Nocturnal Animals. "Shh. Don't worry, honey. I'm sure one of the animals is going to start singing any second now."

This was too many words spent on Sing.

"Why are so many things average? Why aren't all things excellent?"

And then the manager of the TGI Fridays came out and told her "Order something or leave, but get off the table top."

It doesn't take that much of a trick to make recent Al Pacino movies look bad.

I really want to start an awards show called the Thirsties where we award the most craven attempts at Oscar Bait every year. Will, here's your Thirsty Award.

Oh I've got to get me one of these.

I really don't think the show works. At all. I wasn't the biggest Sam Bee fan on the Daily Show (though she should have been given the desk before they gave it to Trevor Noah), and her nightly angsty whine doesn't really land the same way Stewart's comedy did when he was peaking (2000-2012).

In the sense that I hated that movie and at a certain point was actively rooting for it to fail, yeah, I guess he was.

It's okay. Not really good by any stretch of the imagination. Pitt is pretty empty in the role. Plus, he's a Canadian. I know, right?

Yeah, it seems like a lazy move to always think that Cranston would do the role better, but man, he would have crushed the Lex Luthor role.

Maybe? He couldn't have been worse than Eisenberg, though Eisenberg isn't that bad of an actor and I have to question what the hell the director was telling him to do, or the casting director for picking Jesse Eisenberg to play the fucking Lex Luther character. The ingredients don't go together.

Will Smith has never been somebody who disappears into a role. And that's fine. Nobody expects that of him when they go to a Will Smith movie. I can appreciate what a "movie star" does, even if they're not a "thespian", so long as I enjoy the movie star enough.

Shameless is the show your Chardonnay aunt thinks is edgy. Sorry. I usually just ignore shows that I don't like but this one really pissed me off when it tricked me into watching and every episode was not subtle sappy shit about family.

My last company shut down a tavern. I got pretty faced at that and a friend tried to hook up with a waitress. Never did one in the actual office, but I can see why you'd want to set one there for a movie. Looks funnier with people getting hammered by the desks. Come to think of it, I think my wife's company hosts at…

I've legitimately spent 5 minutes thinking about that, trying to come up with somebody worse. I've got nothing. I'm pretty confident he's got a negative COPS (Charisma Over Porn Star) score.

Three word title. Could be a Seagal movie.

Last year I was focused on reading books of the time. This year I wasn't. Non 2016 books:
Little Big Man: Got bored and didn't finish
Jailbird: Pretty good
Eileen: Unreadable
Notes From a Coma: Disappointing
Stranger in a Strange Land: Falls apart in last third
What in God's Name: Simple, and occasionally really funny
Brave…

Agreed. You can put scripture on the napkins. That's it. Stop being so thirsty just because some people are hungry.

I don't know. This looks really stupid.