Rough translation: FUCK YOU!

Here’s a reminder: John Foster Dulles, an American and Republican, was a Nazi sympathizer. He cried when his law firm (Sullivan & Cromwell) voted to stop doing business with Nazi Germany. Despite this, he was still named as Secretary Of State while his brother, Allen Dulles, who was even worse with his Nazi ties, was…

Per gawker style guide, shouldn’t it be Fauxhemian not hipster?

Until you find out that his dad is in the c-suite and his “entry level” job is a VP to which you report.

Mischa Barton, best only known for her role as Marissa Cooper on The OC,

And now Trump’s team has its own private email server issue.

He also inherited around $600 million (decades ago) and his father floated his casino a $3.5mil loan through buying chips he never intended to use for gambling. Casino still failed.

Is this good news for people that have him a death pool?

Or ladders. Or rope. Or going around it.

Not everyone can go to good schools.

Is cleaning up oil spills a union job too?

“Bring you home to mother” has a different meaning for Mike Pence.

Why would your Trump-voting colleague want to live off of the government anyway? Boot straps and all that shit.  

So... countdown until we find this guy passed out in his car with an underage prostitute (of either gender)? Bonus points for the presence of meth.

Ok, but did the mediocre white kid trip anyone?

Start handing out pussy hats to cops.

Donald “Two Corinthians is my favorite book in the Bible” Trump is not religious...? Shocked.

He also suggested that he’s leaving the U.S.

LET US PARK ON THE STREET OVERNIGHT!

A steady diet of gin and hate will do that to a person.