Now, if only my mom had framed it like that, then maybe Sunday mornings wouldn't have been such a battle at my house when I was a kid.

Ironically, many gun nuts DO own 8 cars. It's just that 7 don't run.....

Settle it with a duel. You get a gun. Your buddy gets a can of PBR. Then we can see which is more dangerous....

These guys. Over Jesus's left shoulder. Surely you remember this diagram from your textbook?

Aaaaah....but when he dies from heavy metal poisoning/giant brain tumors, he’ll already have this great tan/pink/rust/internal combustion by-product color shirt that they can bury him in.

Like my old man always said, “As long as you keep your oil properly lubricated, it should last damn near forever.”

This is why old people are always so angry about things like child proof caps and peanut butter allergies. They did stuff like this and thought it was a good idea. Literally, they grew up in a generation where you stuffed your car into a boat,strapped it on a plane and everyone was like “well yeah, of course its safe.…

Sure. Give him those keys. Its all fun and games 'till your son rolls up in a new Malibu.....

Ok. So the "we have a buyer for your car...." thing is B.S. But those Nigerian princes who keep E-mailing me....They're legit, right?

You're Reich. I'll stop.

Yes! Yes! I love Murder By Death! Everytime someone mentions one of these “funniest movie” lists, I say Murder By Death, and everyone is just like “meh” or they’ve never heard of it.

“Degloved zoo penis......”

I did nazi that one coming.....

Sooo.....he posed for a photo op, while holding a copy of his book which has his picture on the cover, all while standing underneath a giant, over sized picture of said book. It’s like Trump cubed. I mean, I know it’s a promotional event, but Jesus Don, Ego much?

Well, in their defense, most Trump rally attendees probably have never actually seen an actual printed book “in the flesh” before. It was most likely a confusing and terrifying experience to see someone just start reading like that. Kind of like showing a fighter jet to a caveman or something.

Aaah yes. Brings back memories. When my brother and I were kids, I don’t EVER think we rode in the “normal” back seat. Anytime we had to go anywhere, dad would just automatically open up the back, and the two of us would hop right in. The odd thing was, our car wasn’t equipped with a “backward seat.” And actually, it…

Most of the good ones have already been taken, but does anyone remember the old Dodge Aspen/ Rex Harrison campaigns of the 70’s? It was just a special kind of sad. You had Harrison, desperately trying to milk the last bit of “My Fair Lady” magic, 10 years after the fact, for a paycheck. And then you had Chrysler,…

I think you’ve really hit the nail on the head, especially with your second point. The Bern is awesome and all, but, my god. Have some of you Sanders guys ever sat down and had a nice little chitty-chat with your next-door neighbor? You know, the one with “NOBAMA” stickers all over his pickup truck? The ‘show me the…