Art. Pure art!

Am feeling oddly inspired and confident I will be triumphant.

Your original comment was something along the lines of ‘you wanted nsa sex and now you’re pissed he’s married’. Now you’re saying something different which is essentially, ‘maybe ask if they are married’. Those are two completely separate topics.

I would love it if we could make Shouty Spice mainstream. In all angry tweets addressed to any political figure or the man himself everyone should refer to him as Shouty Spice. Make fetch happen for me, Jezebel.

I’m currently trying to find a way to work “savagely anal-probed” into as many conversations as possible

....That guy is a bag of poop. I doubt anyone has ever blown him enthusiastically in his life. Maybe blown him once or twice, but nobody has ever mustered enthusiasm for free for someone with such as assy personality.

Wanting no strings attached banging doesn’t mean you want to be a party to someone cheating on their wife.

I hope you don’t eat any meat and don’t support diabetics using insulin if you have that much of a problem with fur.

What an ass. Really. O_O

“virulent assclown”

*blinks*

LMAO. The shit people care about when they get older. Maybe when I’m a homeowner I will give a fuck, but right now I don’t really give a shit about anything beyond my own little space. As long as the people upstairs or next door aren’t murdering each other or overflowing their bathtubs where it leaks into my place I…

People were fucking BRUUUUTAL about the aesthetics in that area. Very snobby, wealthy part of CT. I had relatives who owned a house there and had an ugly yard (the lawn was mowed but it objectively did look like ass and was patchy) and their neighbors actually went to a town hall meeting to try to force them to make…

Don’t be unreasonable you think it’s so easy to just open a new tab and type words and then read them with your eyes

I can’t see the word ‘sad’ anymore without reading it as, “Sad!” in Donald Trump’s voice.

Craig Ferguson actually ended an interview with him when he cracked a joke about how he’d rather get molested than take an ass kicking.

This comment made me laugh my ass off. Brava.

I don’t hate her, I actually feel really sorry for her. She’s just kind of...embarrassing to watch.

There’s always that one person who hears a story like this and immediately makes up a bunch of scenarios where the rude person in question wasn’t actually rude and you’re the crazy person. And yes, they are absolutely going to double down and die on this hill even once you explain that their imaginary scenario (where…

Are you fucking kidding me. Who does that!?