This happened to me when I clipped the side of my coffee table trying to sit on the couch, Dorritos went everywhere, it was horrific.

I much prefer this to me booty calling cows. Drunk dialing, #nobodywins

Stocked with laser cannons, Pringles and PopTarts.

Please tell me it's protected by an over rated actor with gills and a receding hairline.

Yeah, I'm not up on the scene like I used to. Need to pull my cargo pants and glowsticks out of the back of the closet..

But don't exterminate Deadmau5! That would be a dubstep in the wrong direction, his beats get me moving at the gym.

This beats my old method of gauging potency, receiving court orders in the mail from Arkansas. Apparently she is 7 now.

Sweet, I've been looking for a stand that converts to ninja claws so I can scale my building in search of better Wi-Fi.

Yes, I want to know this. Housing Office with my 16g of space is no bueno, but I would love to have it.

Best upskirt shot since I got off the DART this morning...

What a coincidence, that's what 'life' looks like on my discarded tube sock too!

I'm going to stop bitching about when Google Maps directs me to a Starbucks in a grocery store now.

Oh yeah, this girl looks like a total whore with her full front apron and minimal make-up. Toss in the raunchy full on side view of her arm and you are pretty much a pig...

"You'd never want to date someone you used to work with." Are you kidding me? I've hopped on a bunch of chicks that I clicked with at work but we both were smart enough to not mess with co-workers. But when they leave, it's on..

I'm sick of how uppity Gizmodo can be. You can serve an individual pizza on this tablet, put it under a cat bed as a warmer, use it as a shim to even out a wobbly dinner table, it even makes an excellent backboard for a Nerf hoop. Plenty to do with this product.

It's not just having a HW company, it's the end to end integration that makes a great product.

$16??? Should have done this in Detroit and saved $12 for utilities.

"between 5:30am and 11am that day"

Keep your soup ladel, cock pump looking multi-piece Tupperware solution, the thing on the right with the big red X over it fits on my desk.

If Special Forces hadn't worked, diabetes would have eventually done the job.