I think the quote about the wedding being the "point" and not the marriage afterwards is really important. I worked weddings, and we would take bets on which brides would be depressed after the honeymoon based on how completely insane they were about the day itself. Spending a lot of energy planning isn't the problem,…

judging from the video I'm gonna say..... '84 intutlé douché. It contains hints of Axe body spray, the dry corn chippy musk of a guy whose so up himself he doesn't really bother grooming & just the faintest flutter of entitlement & disdain for others unlike him. In other words "cheap", "disposable"& 11 bucks at your…

I only do it when I have time to kill and/or am in the mood to find it amusing.

My mother is a first born and definitely *doesn't* do this but it might be like a male/first born cross over kind of thing. I'm super open to that theory.

Hahahaha! I hope he knows and just doesn't care because I think that's way, way cuter :)

Yep, mine's also pretty concise but I don't understand 90% of it. He sighs when I ask him what "CCM" is (or is it CCS? IDK. Something to do with powerful shells) because he has literally been talking about CCM for a month every day after work. It's not that I didn't listen (the first time...), it's that I didn't…

The dread when you drop a spoon in the garbage disposal and YOU KNOW your fingers are going to brush against a wet, slimy piece of something you once let mold in the refrigerator. I am seriously squicked out just thinking about it.

Hey...itheedread folks - can I just make a point here? I love this concept for a feature. My wife loves the concept of this feature. But both of us are just a *wee* bit bothered by the title of it. I am not her husband. She is most DEFINITELY not my husband! (The type of ignorant-ass straight folks who would ask…

There is nothing in this world more satisfying than cleaning the last pot while the entree rests! Food tastes better with that kind of satisfaction.

They make compostable food scrap bags! I got a sample box and they're PERFECT for this crap.

My absolutely wonderful fiance is the same with the meandering stories. And he'll say, "Anyway, long story short" like five times while he's telling it. I finally lost it one day and interrupted him with, "IF YOU SAY 'LONG STORY SHORT' FIVE TIMES DURING A STORY, YOU ARE NOT MAKING IT SHORT!!!"

Her garbage bowl is hilarious to me, because it's like a fifty dollar bowl.

I realize that. They should stop going to church until their demands are met. Maybe hold mass with all the same values as before except the BC ones if they truly believe.

Dear [redacted],

My ex worked for them to design window displays. He was the one who put the wig in the mannequins underwear. He should disappear. #Bitter.

"The kind of bombing you see on the nightly news…" You mean those bombs that they use on Planned Parenthood locations? The specifically NOT glittery variety?

Did they include a tiny little hanger with the glitter?

also, asshole.

ughhhhh pleaseeeee do not ask me to marry you:

I actually wasn't convinced on that one. I felt like the storyteller was reading a lot of malice into that kid's behavior that wasn't necessarily there. She set up the story by telling us about how bratty and entitled they were just because they were coming from a debate team event, without actually giving any…

I'm reluctant to condone an egging, but it seems justified in this case. My preferred method is coating the windshield with vaseline. It can't be driven until it's cleaned, but what a pain in the ass to try and get it removed. No lasting damage to the vehicle and the look on the cashier's face when you set down a…