Please. He was pitching the world’s tiniest tent. And it didn’t stay up long.

These were the days....

No on else wanted it as badly as Ryan and the other crazy people in line behind him were more dangerous and reckless.

I already made this joke elsewhere but I’m fond of it:

Considering he chose to send unsolicited pics of “a penis” instead of his own, my guess is the tent he’s pitching ain’t all that big.

I’m still waiting for Trump himself to eat shit, as per this lady’s request all the way back in November of last year:

by simultaneous backward steps by everybody else...

No one else wanted it. Literally no one else wanted it.

Having a bar body. Impresses the amateurs.

The begging was more due to the fact that no one else wanted to jump on the hand grenade that was/is trying to reconcile the Tea Party shitheads with reality. Technically he still was their savior in that he was the only one willing to swallow the shit sandwich, which is why he could make demands, but the fawning…

Believe it or not, Ryan came in as the savior of the House, the charismatic and brilliant boy genius legislator who could unite the warring factions in the House and restore regular order to Congress.

Enthusiastic beach-goer and New Jersey governor Chris Christie is reportedly in talks with MSNBC and CNN about television commentator roles after his term ends.

Yep. And Ryan has now given up all pretense of being the Speaker of the whole House instead of just the GOP.

“Hurricane Irma is of epic proportion, perhaps bigger than we have ever seen. Be safe and get out of its way,if possible. Federal G is ready!”

IRMER GERD

Preach!

I’m an adult and I still have a crush on her. She hosted a screening and Q&A of Away From Her and she was being so sweet and friendly afterwards and chatting with everyone and I love her so much I couldn’t bring myself to go talk to her. And I regret it every. single. day.

That must enable you to sleep at night. With your relatives.

If you haven’t seen The Stories We Tell, which she wrote and directed, get thee to Amazon and stream it. 

I loved her as Ramona Quimby and reading her anecdote about the incident with the camera operator when she was 9....wasn’t she about that age when she played Ramona?! Did some camera operator make that comment to RAMONA F’ING QUIMBY!? He must die.