icannotremembermyoldburner
I Cannot Remember My Old Burner
icannotremembermyoldburner

Oooo . . . are you ready for this rabbit hole? It’s so entertaining: https://www.thecut.com/2019/09/the-story-of-caroline-calloway-and-her-ghostwriter-natalie.html

Did we not once know that Ben was a gambling addict? I feel like this was an established thing, then the next thing I knew he was doing ads for casinos.

Ok, without context of whatever they’re actually spending or asking of the servers is one thing, but this just sounds like Ben is getting wasted/feeling himself at the tables and just throwing money at the tip, then Jen reigns it back in. Dealer tips are always a grey area anyway, they’re not your friend and they’re

I don’t want to hear this band’s music. I don’t want to have to know that this band exists. I have no idea why I clicked on this link (I think I confused him with someone else, kinda like sometimes I read something that Michael Sheen said in an interview and until I scroll to a photo, I think Martin Sheen said it).

Imagining how the conversation went:

This article is one of the worst try-hard examples of attempting to create some sort of controversy out of absolutely nothing.

Does anyone besides this author honestly believe that in between the first and second date, John Krasinski wrote a memo to Emily Blunt, saying not to wear the jacket again or there wouldn’t be a second date?

Does anyone else besides this author feel fucking ridiculous for actually voicing such a thing out loud?

Here’s

I think it IS time to leave Britney alone. 

I generally hate the phrase ‘the exception that proves the rule’, but in this case it actually fits. Her scenes in What’s Eating Gilbert Grape were shot around her, with the production coming out to her instead of vice versa. If it’s logistically easier to move a dozen people to set up around one than it is for that

How do I hate this article? Let me count the ways.

That show - and two of its contemporaries - epitomize the evils of reality TV.

When Jon & Kate first started, it really focused on how this family dealt with eight kids, six the same age. You could legitimately take tips from that show.

Then it became Kate going from some gentle eye-rolling at her husband’s

I’m not an attorney, but I have graduated from multiple Law & Order franchise marathons over the last 20 years.

Early on in Parks & Rec the writers often had April in the background of scenes with nothing to do. Aubrey Plaza decided April would have a crush on Andy because he was in a band & started flirting with him & the writers noticed & started writing to this story. So one of the best ever TV romances happened because of a

The rhythm method is great.

I’m still not sure who she is or what she’s done apart from date Kanye West for a few weeks, but she’s kooky and entertaining and seems harmless. Shantay, you stay.

Sweet.  Did Letitia Wright hire a scientist to teach her science?

Maybe it is pandemic related, but I'm really buying in to these cheesy lifetime/Hallmark movies that I've always scoffed at in the past. They aren't good movies but you bet your ass I watched the whole thing (maybe some in the background, but still).

People’s 41-year-old Sexiest Man Alive has a 25-year-old girlfriend.

No, get a cassowary instead.

Her daughters Christina Ricci and Winona Ryder should probably try to encourage her to meet a nice guy closer to her age & not a gigolo