I envy the Patriots’ success, however achieved, which made those losses to Eli Manning so exquisite. I like to think that in sub-Saharan Africa some tribe of nomads is clad in “19-0" shirts as they tend to their goats.

You mad, bro? You seem mad, bro. Don’t be mad, bro.

See, I love pointing out to Patriots Apologists that the Ideal Gas Law does not work with air, and that they have to use Van Der Waals Equations.

And Belichick is just the sociopathic kid from down the street who when he isn’t peeking at your controller, he’s drowning kittens.

This is the only time reading one of these where the fan posts made me hate the team even more because most of them went on to do what you just made fun of them for.

I have to give it to you Pats fans—you’ve even managed to complain about not being made fun of the right way. You’re truly a special breed (that is NOT a compliment).

pretty accurate in some regards

he even called in to the most popular sports morning radio show here & took phone calls. it was glorious.

Rooting for the Patriots is like rooting for the Lannisters to take over Westeros. Belichick is Tywin, Brady is Jaime, and Gronk is the Mountain but much funnier. Dion Lewis is Tyrion and often treated badly by everyone but Brady (Jaime).

That’s “Mr. Kraft” to Patriots fans, show some respect.

I lived in Worcester MA when the Giants beat the Pats in 2011. My car had NY plates and I left the party to find my tires slashed. really good representation of the type of people who root for this team

Counterpoint: Why Your Team’s Great: Bob Kraft formed Run CTE.

I moved to Pittsburgh 7 years ago from Wisconsin—one mouth-breathing, inbred fanbase to another (and I’m a Packer fan). Anyway, just started a new job and one of my coworkers is a grandma—very nice lady, make sure there’s fresh cookies in the break room on a weekly basis and always sweetly demands you eat a few. She…

My favorite moment as a Browns fan was the Steelers losing to tebow in the playoffs and watching my snot nosed 8-year old cousin from Pittsburgh cry. God that was delicious

I’m gonna assume that’s from The Onion, even though it’s not.

Everything you need to know about where this franchise is headed can be gleaned from the opening paragraph (THIS WAS THE FUCKING OPENING) of a profile of their owner.

I submit that nobody has ever gotten a good cheesesteak anywhere.

“It’s more of a ding on Shanahan than Griffin that those were considered insolvable problems.”

It seems like a QB with poor fundamentals can get by on athleticism and a simplified playbook, but not after other teams have had a full offseason to prep.