Second the mindfulness. Also, pick one thing to do a day and stick to it. That is your goal—one thing a day. Maybe it’s going to work. Maybe it’s the dishes. Could be taking a shower.

I’m with you on that sinking ship, and all I can do is snuggle the cat for relief. This is my favorite saying right now:

Have your 8th graders been as useless as ours? “Hooray, we’re high schoolers now.”

Omg I read that as grout. It would totally suck to have sandy cement in my crevices unless I was a piece of tile.

What, is he a pharmicist? Then he should have been a doctor. Asshole.

Diffy-Q? That gif is perfect. Also, if you figure out what a Hamiltonian is, could you post and explain? I still don’t get it.

Where is this place? I want to volunteer there.

Oh, that’s what those were! Too small and lumpy to be dress shields...

Admittedly, I don’t know how to causate, but how do pregnancy tests prevent birth defects? Or is it “Imabout to get mah drink on, let’s see if I’m preggo,” like that ever stopped anyone? Also, the number one way to prevent birth defects? BIRTH CONTROL.

But what about the bread things? The other table has them...

It’s a norovirus. A virus. Antibiotics don’t work against virii. Besides, the nearest pharmacy is....ASHORE.

A white rhino? Aren’t those going extinct in the wild?

Why would you do that to birds? Birds deserve better. They fly around. They have colored feathers. Some even lay eggs.

Yeah, why do you want to ruin the rest of his life? She may lose her job, have to move, be the target of scorn and ridicule, but he will lose out on millions of dollars playing a spectator sport!

“It works extremely well.”

*rootles through junk drawer for that elusive octopus, other hand holding jam jar*

No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: “The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist”, “Fillings of Passion”, “The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink”.

Hm. Wonder if she was under duress (shut up or you’ll never see your son again).

I love you and I hate you for that idea...

*Mila reaches out and puts a paw on your arm*