Wooooooo 1-0 baby! We’re well on our way to another 10-6 record and soul crushing first round exit!

Update: lol.

(Jets miss an extra point)

I feel like Jets and Chiefs fans should share a stronger bond than they do. Won Super Bowls with hall of fame QB’s fifty years ago and haven’t been back since. Also haven’t really had a QB worth a wet shit since either but did get to enjoy a broken down Montana and Favre respectively.

As a lifelong Jets fan, I call days like this “Sunday.”

Don’t dress like a slut. You’re playing Baylor for Christ's sake.

Larry Bird wonders why this guy is so modest.

All I can say is thank CHRIST they penalized that one guy for jumping up and down after his team scored a touchdown. We need to keep that sort of behavior in check.

I think in a time of our nation where healing is so needed, we owe it to our children and to the world to change the national anthem to Prince’s “Let’s Go Crazy.”

“It is my dream to play baseball”

That’s the biggest burn on Atlanta since...oh, too soon?

May I offer the following alternative: Cobb County Con Artists or perhaps simply the Cons

There is a team on a winning streak that literally hit 3 home runs with two outs in the ninth inning to win last night. They won again tonight. Do you cover them?

Wait, go back to the part where we herd ISIS into the walled area......

6. Should read “bankruptcy"

1. Take the oil

He was drafted as a defensive end and was granted an exemption and allowed to keep his number when he moved to linebacker.

Remember kids: the first person Manning kissed after the Super Bowl was Papa Fucking John.