“Tears in Heaven” is the one that gets me. It’s about his kid dying. It’s not a love song you should have as your first dance at your wedding.

He says “wasting away in Margaritaville” right in the chorus. Its the bit everyone knows. I don’t get it!

I’ve been to two weddings where the groom’s surname was Jones and both of them had their first dance to well-known adulterers’s anthem, Me and Mrs Jones. People. Do. Not. Listen.

And the people who dedicate Pearl Jam’s cover of Last Kiss to their sweetie on the radio. The girl dies. That’s the point.

NASA should save him a seat on the first mission to the Sun “Mars”.

Or put his name in huge gold letters affixed to the planet itself.

All cause Trump wants bragging rights. And probably because he wants to put a hotel there.

He would have an evolutionary advantage what with the natural camoflauge of his complexion.

He’ll feel right at home... an orange man on a red planet.

Let’s make him the first orange-American in space.

I volunteer President Circus Peanut and his spawn to go! And no fuel to return!

In the states this is what we mean when we say American Cheese. This is actually called a “pasturized processed cheese food product” since it can’t legally be called cheese by our standards. I have tried to eliminate these from my life but dammit I just can’t! I know there are better, more flavorful cheeses out there!…

Mall security has more authority than waitstaff.

On the plus side, this waiter has likely cratered this restaurant’s business model.

They should have asked him for his SAG card in return.

Jesus H Christ. You’re a fucking waiter asshole. It’s not your job to play amateur ICE agent. Just take the orders and serve the food, but I have the feeling you can’t even do that without fucking it up.

Seriously. I was thinking “what?! Do you NOT want money?!”

The hell? What if they weren’t? I’m Canadian and have vacationed in Cali several times, and have *gasp* eaten in restaurants. As a non-local citizen.

WTF!!!! Paying customers are paying customers. Welcome to hell hole america.

Well, a bunch of foot-stomping little bully’s elected him, sooooo...