before you get all crazy with his commitment as a coach it’s actually a tape of her fucking the guy from the front desk from the last road trip

He said, ‘All right then, I’m out.’ They said, ‘You want to cut the umbilical cord?’ He said, ‘No, I’m good.’”

Yeah. The fact that this is treated as anything other than psychotic, selfish, insane behavior is nuts.

I sleep 8 hours a night, spend time with my wife, don’t answer e-mails off hours and I’ve NEVER been fired by the Dolphins.
Check and mate, shitbrains.

Fuck Pompei for acting like this is a normal, good thing & fuck Gase for being THAT asshole boss who doesn’t leave his employees alone ever. The fact that he’s a mediocre coach just adds the cherry on the shit sundae.

The only thing worse than a shitty retread football coach is a shitty retread football coach with a litany of batshit, self-detrimental habits that purportedly underscore their commitment to their craft.

Also that knot is way too big. What a goober.

All this dramatic, psychotic behaviour, and he won’t retire with a winning record. The Jets will probably go 7-9 this season. I learned when I saw Rudy Giuliani boasting that he only slept 4 hours per night (this was way before a 767 flew into my building), to never judge a man by the quantity of waking hours he puts…

I look forward to seeing him picked by the Giants in the first round of the 2020 draft.

Sure, Amell might be embarrassed right now but this serves as a first rate audition for my upcoming epic C’mon, Man, I’m Wide Open: The Christian Hackenberg Story.

Oh sure it looks bad, but that's only because you put exactly what they said into print with the appropriate amount of context around it to get across exactly what they were trying to say!

Ann Coulter, 12/3/18:

It took me a minute to realize those were two photos side by side, and not one photo showing one Thunder player doubled over in ball pain while a rampaging Green kicks another one in the balls right next to him.

Oh, good. Four more years of this nut-kicking, eye-scratching loud mouthed d-bag tarnishing the reputation of what otherwise could be a classy franchise. He’s an abomination, a stain on the NBA. Photo documentation to follow.

Design meeting:

“What should the failure mode be for the wave generator?”
“Nothing, it should just die quietly and stop functioning.”
“We could do that. Or.. and hear me out on this one...”

It took 11 years, but he finally stuck the landing.

it seems that the season won’t actually kick off for 154 days, which is December 30.

Because Carmelo Anthony is a delusion diva and James Dolan is a fucking idiot.

FitzMagic and now Linsanity? Harvard grads have it so tough in 2019.

Well, I mean, he was doing this 5 years ago too. 45 doesn’t seem nearly as weird.

Literally eating cold pizza (square-cut, at that) while reading this Funbag and this comment, so agreed.