Tiger balm works pretty good

Ahem. The JaMo doesn’t “cop” feels. Feels are freely, nay, enthusiastically rendered unto him.

I was going to say that Get A Job dude’s topless wife there is some kind of ugly...

Of course she booked when she got to the airport and found out the dude was actually Sloth from Se7en, can yiz blame her???

I know it’s hard, but you have to be strong for him. And, of course, get down on your knees every night and pray that he re-aligns gender before high school. So she can get a shot at the American Dream.

I sure won’t be coming any time soon. Even if Cheeto Jesus isn’t Clown President.

If these jokers

Thanks for checking in from 1959. Listen, see what you can do to stop Kentucky Fried Chicken from changing their gravy recipe, wouldja?

Back in the 00s, when Libertarianarianismness was first picking up steam, I asked an American buddy what it was, and he said “Ah, they’re just Republicans who want weed legalized”

Thanks. Actually, the Keyed Kid in Kuestion just kicked her first ever boyfriend to the curb after a year together, for, among other disrespectments, making one crack too many about her (fucking perfect) body shape. He’s been crying for 2 weeks, like a (as she says) “little girl”, for her to take him back. She ain’t…

Sorry to double dip here, but I keep thinking about this.

You heard me, punchy.

Annnnnd....they wanted to cater to the tastes of an unrepentant prick like that? Seems to me that complaining like that would be a useful EAW (Early Asshole Warning), wherein the dude is someone you’d never want to pork any frigging ways and thereby saving you the trouble of finding out the hard way. Sort of like Axe…

I’m disabled!

You have to tell me you’re quoting the end of John Mellencamp’s video for Rumble Seat...

I swear I read this 4 times before I realized it said lemon PARTIES and not lemon PATTIES, which would be, you know, what the jeez???

Sarah Palin talking to James Carville is like watching a video of Carl Sagan playing chess with an earthworm.

I keep watching the video clip, I’m in serious danger of peeing. Down BOTH legs. Darby’s scream. The one girl with glasses laughing hysterically at Darby’s scream. And then, just when I think it’s done, I notice the third girl holding onto Darby’s legs, which might be the funniest part. Really, I have to go to the…

When I was a kid and those super duper short Adidas sport shorts were all the rage, this was a fairly common occurrence during the summer. We referred to it as “popping an erster (oyster)“. Of course, it was only by accident and the perp would quickly adjust the offending mollusk post-haste in extreme embarrassment.…

I can’t speak for “people”, but they’re deffo one of my own favorite spots to visit on the whole Lady Tasting Tour. Just for a, you know...pit stop.