All I know about all that is that you can’t help an addict until they want to be helped. Until then, avoid enabling.

To students of body language, the pursed lips say it all.

You have Leroy Brown to thank for that.

I guess I have better friends. Mine deserve trays. Or maybe I’m just nicer to mine.

Don’t worry, no one will sugar coat your racism. Top post on the Reddit thread: “...just wanted to say that you’re taking all the passive-aggressive race-related shots from nerdy spoiled rich kids like a champ...”

I already knew Norm MacDonald wasn’t funny at all. Now I know he can’t write either.

Fifty bucks for a pillow? I guess I haven’t bought any for a while. Mine certainly suck.

Fifty bucks for a pillow? I guess I haven’t bought any for a while. Mine certainly suck.

And before pit bulls were popular people wanted to ban rottweilers. And before rotties were popular people wanted to ban dobermans. But somehow the doberman and rottie problem went away. Did they do what you said and create restrictions and insurance requirements? No. Pop culture simply moved on from one junk science…

I’m sorry, I got confused as to which myth you were promoting.

Here’s the problem: if the consequences for this crime are merely financial, then breaking the law will never be more to big corporations than the cost of doing business. They should incur a multi-year suspension of trade rights with the US.

“I don’t really know, because not immediately stopping for gas when that light pops on is a fantastic way to damage your fuel pump.”

Thank you. It’s hard to convince people this old gem is bullshit.

You know about fuel filters, right?

This is brilliant. It’s polite, not disruptive, and very effective.

Well I’m not a Hillary Hater but this is patently untrue:

You got that exactly right. That’s the spotlight effect they’re always talking about here. Truth is, no one notices. No one notices what you’re wearing, what shoes you have on, what you do, what your expression is, if they do interact with you it’s all forgotten within minutes.

Amy Schumer is a goddess.

Here’s what I don’t like about cooking with cherry tomatoes, or any small tomatoes: the skin to flesh ratio is too high. This kind of sauce has the potential to turn into mush with lots of chewy peels.

You missed the biggest reason why the songs that are popular get played in the first place so they can become popular: because the record labels pay the radio stations to play them. If you listen to radio, especially one of the big syndicated networks, you are getting the songs shoved down your throat that the label…