The bulky pants hide his Depends, to prevent such a dribble from soaking his socks again.

Secret Service was pulled along in the wake of the vacuum from Donald as he rushed to the elevator.

I’m hoping for a neurological event that leaves him lucid enough to watch his world crumble, his allies turn on him, and his children loot his estate, but not able to do anything about it.

“....a wildling girl, a baby, and Lord Trump. I found him there after the battle was over. In a puddle of his own making.....”

Well there is probably shit all over the walls now that the orangutan (no offense to real orangutans) was in there.

The president is reportedly 239 pounds, something that’s a bit hard to believe if you’ve ever seen a photo of the man.

I can’t believe they had him in the bunker and forgot to lock him in there forever. Talk about missed opportunities.

Anyone who supports “the ends justify the means” is going to be real butt hurt when there way of thinking falls out of favor and some other faction takes control.

I’ll never forget how he treated the First Lady on Day One.

Trump is such a pussy.

Kind of like this. Eh?

I bet he beat everyone else to the bunker. They probably didn’t even know he went down there for a while. It’s was probably like when a house with a small child gets “too quiet” and you have to go find out what’s wrong.

It’s not clear if President Trump was carried to the bunker on Friday, nor is it clear how many agents would be required to do such a thing. The president is reportedly 239 pounds, something that’s a bit hard to believe if you’ve ever seen a photo of the man.

President Harry Truman, who would follow Roosevelt, overhauled the White House in 1948

If Bob and Doug didn’t crash, I bet I know what they were delivering to the ISS.

That’s a terrible thing to do to a trash can.

Next, Trump will announce America’s withdrawal from the EU.

Do people really think there were literal kids out there and it was ordered by the Guard? Fuck me we’ve gotten dumb. Putting all morality aside, it would be a horrendous strategic decision to use kids.