He took his mooooooooommmmmmmmm

He’s just goddamned perfection.

Lord have mercy.

The final State Dinner of the Obama Presidency, complete with Frank Ocean?! They would’ve escorted me out for sobbing uncontrollably.

Unrelated...

I’ll be in my bunk.

It makes me a little petty-happy she has the terrible hair because I think she is an awful person and the bad hair seems to be the only comeuppance she is going to receive.

Hey now can we please not insult uncircumcised penises by comparing them to Donald Trump.

I mean, I don’t blame her if she is!

Seriously. She is a straight-up bombshell! I love Frank’s vans, too.

OMG the Andrettis both look so adorable!

Good Lord, Katonya Breaux. I’ll have the exact same blend of sacrificed virgin blood she’s having, please .

So, Jessica Seinfeld is still doing the blonde thing.

“I don’t mind praying to the Eternal Father, but I must be the only man in the country afflicted with an eternal mother.”

Trump has inspired the best Double Creatures. My favorite:

These Double Creature choices are not to be understood, so let’s provide our own. Last week I put in one of Trump posing next to a bottom-feeding fish with yuge puckered orangey-pink lips. There were others in the comments, including my favorite, a windblown Trump next to a windblown horse’s rear. A link to this…

I call bullshit! There’s no way Travolta is having sex with any woman, let alone his wife.