“calm, cool, and collective”

Josh Gordon Says He Got Drunk Before Every Browns Game

Jay Peterman, world famous seller of clothes and the best the Jets could scrape together to play QB. They were also going to make history by bringing in Elaine Benes to play wide receiver but she refused to take off an Orioles hat to put on the helmet so they had to cut her.

Phoenix is a good fit. The Suns will revolve around him, like ours does.

Cowherd’s contractually obligated to call a black person lazy in every segment.

I can’t wait til Kaep caves, goes out and punches a woman and murders a few dogs and immediately gets offers from multiple NFL teams.

Dogged by Mike Vick. That’s ruff man.

I like to think his most exciting hits occur behind the scenes with various baby mommas and concubines....

You are aware that boxers are commonly referred to as “fighters” and a boxing match is typically referred to as a “fight,” correct? And even technical or defensive boxers are known as “technical fighters” or “defensive fighters.” And he’s 49-0. If Laura had called him one of the greatest knockout artists or sluggers,…

People have tried moving against Floyd, but has anyone tried not moving?

he could face the scummiest, most vile opponent, who cheats to win in the most obvious ways and with outside interference, and the people will still refuse to support the Progressive Liberal.

I think he’d make a great tag team partner with Unprincipled Pragmatist.

His finishing move is “The Safe Space” in which he runs his opponent over from inside his Prius.

When the officer asked Tiger where he was coming from he probably should have come up with something a little more believable than golfing.

You know what they say about letting sleeping tigers drive.

tag urself im bumgarner

That’s a good way to fuck up a kicker’s confidence.

I almost wonder if Obama reverse-psychologied Trump by telling him not to hire Flynn. On the obvious level, of course he’d tell him not to hire Flynn, Obama was aware that Flynn should not be given access to any state secrets. If he listened, great, job well done. But on a deeper one, he had to be aware that by…

But who would you like to see cry on camera the most? For me it’s definitely Mitch McConnel, his face would look so weird.

I seriously most earnestly hope this throws everything from here on out. Pence knew. McConnell knew. Ryan knew that this was a flaming corporate cess fire that was heading straight for our actual lives.