Similarly, a good friend of mine had Sia’s Chandelier on her party playlist. I was like, “you know this is about substance abuse, right?” awkward...

Ah, my old lady cat isn’t actually all that elderly, she turns 10 this spring. She’s still pretty spry, but she has a hawkish glare that hides her sweet-as-can-be demeanor. Although she has learned the benefits of a gravelly husky meow, so I think we can expect more of that from her! Also my old lady is only 6 lbs,…

and his behavior incentivizes people to be yes-men. Staffers (I imagine) are scared shitless of losing their jobs if they correct him. So they go with the flow. This has all happened before (see also: Enron) and it will all happen again.

I don’t have an issue with there being a dress code for pass travelers. What I *do* have an issue with is the dress code applying primarily to female dress. As you say, cargo shorts are (objectively) way grosser than leggings in general, and yet, they are allowed... And at what age does the dress code begin to…

same!! My baby girl is always at the door waiting for me when I walk up to the house. And my beloved old lady kitty is basically glued to my body as soon as I sit down. Yesterday she was feeling snuggy when I was taking off my nail polish so she leapt from the back of the toilet onto my shoulders in desperation!

holy shit that gif is gold

Tum again?

OMG I loved selfie SO MUCH. The writing was so fucking good.

I LOVED SELFIE WITH MY WHOLE HEART IT WAS SO GOOD.

centuries of socialization to be “nice”

this sounds at least munchausen adjacent.

fair.

came here to say this! former ballet dancer here, and I was all “you don’t say break a leg you say merde goddamnit.”

This won’t work for everyone because it is a luxury, but I hired a house cleaner via an agency (it’s actually fairly affordable, considering). It costs a little less than $100 for a professional to come and clean my house thus meaning that cleaning is out of my hands (almost) entirely. We used to spend almost all…

good lord, he’s so rich (or at least lives like he’s rich) that it probably doesn’t even occur to him that weekly trips to florida cost money. He’s like, what, i already have air force 1, what could it cost to fuel it up? $100?

god the presidential salary is pennies compared to what he spends on those weekend jaunts to the “southern whitehouse”

none of the above, how about post-apocalyptic “last man on earth”? Everyone seems to have access to clean clothes and showers and stuff.

My question in reading this article: is *any* other family of procedures/medical specialty regulated in such detail as abortion? Like, are there laws indicating precisely what technique may be used in performing, say, an appendectomy? Like WT actual F. Legislators are fucking NOT DOCTORS (usually) so like SHUT THE…

that umlaut-ed LOL was internet gold.

starring for RIP and also ur handle. Rick&Morty for lyfe!