That's the first thing I thought of too. I thought, "shit, he's liable to straight-up kill her now."

Janay Rice laments Ray Rice suspension: "Oh fuck, he's REALLY gonna hurt me now..."

The scary thing is the video we all saw before (of him dragging her out of an elevator unconscious) was not enough for people to be convinced he deserved more punishment.

Wow. I would have had to have shown up hungry, gift-less, wearing a wetsuit, and dragging two random ill-behaved children behind me.

I flew right past the gist of the first paragraph, and read the rest thinking "fuck yeah, everybody should be taught these basic rules for being a good wedding guest."

Not all the time, but a very smart person once said that you should always include a little of yourself to make the story more relatable to others. That person? Albert Einstein Jessica Coen.

Did anyone send a list of counter-demands?

If you have to call something classy, it ain't classy.

"This wedding is a classy affair"

WOW. That's amazing. The worst I've seen was my husband's cousin who, while also having a dry Baptist wedding, also included a screed about dress code on their website. It was like, "We've seen people at weddings who look like they are going to a baseball game and we think that's just awful. We want to cherish our…

It's like a misogyny primer for third-graders. "Women are different Down There! We call it Satan's Weed Patch!"

I have misplaced all 4 pairs of my reading glasses again. It's hell getting old.

I may or may not have used this as an excuse not to eat kidney beans as a child.

Pharmacists have to deal with sick people. That is even worse than hungry people.

I've worked in every type of customer service, now I'm a pharmacist so still have to deal with people constantly. I've reached the conclusion that ALL (ok, like 98%) people are insane as soon as they leave their homes (or pick up the telephone). Honestly, if I have an interaction that doesn't leave me angry, baffled,…

The customer who walked in with three kids, sat at a table and asked one of my servers, "Do you guys have nachos?" (I'd like to point out that he would have walked directly by the sign on the front of the building that read "authentic Italian thin-crust pizza") The server informed him that we did not, but we did have…

God help me, but these stories make me feel so much better about myself.

i try and be sweet and nice......BUT BITCHY-ASS CUSTOMERS ARE

"You have red wines and white wines, right? Then just take some red and white wine and mix them together!"