Chicago Justice did Chicago justice.

Sadly, no. Cousin Larry has been diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s, so everyone he meets is now a perfect stranger. Oh, and that revolving door? It was removed for installing a webcam in the ladies’ room.

So Balki and Cousin Larry hilariously struggling against the wind and navigating that revolving door is no longer an accurate depiction of Chicago life?

Phew. I thought this was going to be a story about me again.

Moby’s uncle totally works for Nintendo.

What a terrible lie.  That movie’s a lot better than fine.

It was the last book I read. It’ s insight that “books are stupid and pointless and pretty when set on fire” is the only real insight a book has ever given to humanity.

They’ve lived here since they were children. It was good enough for most of our ancestors.

You’d have to be some sort of imbecile to immigrate from Norway into Donald Trump’s America.

Your jokes are fucking bad through two articles, are you ever even funny?

They should take this opportunity to change their name to:

Please refer to us as “beta cucks”. Thank you.

I’d trade Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansas, both Dakotas, and Wyoming for Guatemala.

This was, like, a half hour ago, and “Shithole Countries” has already put out their first album and been added to Coachella.

Go blow it out your ass, you fucking idiot.

All roles, it’s a one man show now

Playing Pokémon GO is good for your health and your social skills, and the worse you are at the start the more it helps. People who play Pokémon GO are more than twice as likely to hit a target of walking 10,000 steps a day, claims a new study presented to the American Heart Association. The study covered 167 iPhone…

What you do is, see, you give Kodak all your credit card numbers, and if one of them is lucky, they’ll send you a prize!

I don’t know what you’re accusing him of, but I for one will never believe that Mark Davis is a guy who would allow any corners to be cut.

Eh, how ‘bout we don’t?