Oh my god I don’t want him to leave.

You can tell he’s a great dad, both from how he interacts with kids in public and from his relationship with his own daughters. He seems so comfortable with them and genuinely caring.

Throw yer hands in the ayair!
And wave em like ya just don’t cayare!
And if we passed the Iran Treaty say yeeaaaaah!
YEAAAAAH!

I love “no longer gives a fuck” Obama so much. Going off, hanging with Bear Grylls, dancing with children, getting major policy bills passed...

ugh someone help me get this huge stupid grin off my face before my co-workers think I care about things.

She looks like the meanest, most hate filled person I’ve seen lately.

Can you blame it? I probably would.

if I ever met him in person, I might be overwhelmed enough to do the same.

I’m laughing because this is sad and true. Relevant:

I’m constantly tripping over the low bar for men.

That is so fucked up. I feel so bad for the daughter.

This is beautifully sad

HGTV by way of Faulkner is the single best descriptor I've ever read.

After being dead for 18 years, my father in law still has a stalker.

Alright, I obviously was not there, but this is one of the best funeral/memorial stories I’ve heard to date:

Just this summer, my uncle died. His cremated remains were brought from his state of residence to SC for interment. The graveside service, attended only by family, was held in the middle of the day during that godawful heat wave we had. It was 108 degrees. Three generations of my family stood around in our Sunday…

Totally. I wouldn’t even want people standing over me watching me sleep, I SURELY don’t want then doing it once I’m actually dead. For their sake and mine.

And now I’ve won pissing contest twice, Madeline! And my one post got starred over 1000 times! CAN I PLEASE BE OUT OF THE GREYS NOW?!