What's white and red and smooshed into a cube shape?

+OJ'd

It's a real shame these young kids have to grow up with a KHOU KHOU dad.

golsh darnit to heck, these new rules make me wanna cunt punt someone!

Nobody fucks with Colonel Sanders.

You've obviously never tried their Cunt Punt burger.

"Til death do us part...even if that parting involves my fist."

reporters gyana report

Punters hate getting it in the face. Just ask Chris Kluwe.

...which they clearly stole from Notre Dame alumni tailgates.

they had to stop the game in Columbus, only briefly, when the field became poisoned by the Axe body spray seeping from all the Carhartt sweatshirts lying on the field.

"Too old." — Franck Ribery

Herpes Derp

Festively Plump

"I never thought a seafood store named The Depths would take off like it has, and I also wonder why Mr. Winston's goes by Steve Bargeron now," stated The Depths' sole proprietor, Reginald Smith.

Perhaps he was trying to engage in a small WAR?

Woah there, Officer Wilson!

Finally, Ryan Gosling found the only location no lady would ever spot him: the Bucknell gridiron.

Cue appropriate mascot names in 3...2...1...

This is nothing new. We already know that every guy floating around New York wants to put his stinger into an Asian chick.