"Hey."

But drinking, intimidation, humiliation, and disrespect are the pillars of a typical Dalhousie University Polar Bear Plunge!

+All The Herpes

"No, Dave. The government did not scatter 411 dead people around Detroit last year. Now, eat your soup."

The letter writer was delighted to patronize Sharpie's new Chinaman-colored highlighter, it seems.

"We do all KINDS of crazy shit for points!"

Upon further investigation, it was discovered that referee Ed Vanderlanzen received a distress call from Gov. Jan Brewer, in which she high-pitchedly argued — in between swipes of the oil rag used to clean her muzzeloader — that someone named Sabatino Chen couldn't possibly be in the state legally.

Bzzzt, false alarm. Suzy Kolber was nowhere in sight.

+Greenbough, AlaBAMA

...in other news, Toyota recently decided to suspend production on its 2014 hybrid crossover marketed to 18-34 year old male outdoorsmen, the Tragic Irony, after Justin Beiber was spotted endorsing one in Hollywood this weekend.

Is anyone else wondering a) who took the picture and/or b) who decided that said picture was a certified keeper?

Can successfully spell multiple four-letter adjectives in public

Oh, I don't disagree. But what I discovered is that I trust my ability to sniff out someone with the propensity to do so in an arena with far fewer expectations, and far more revelations, than an online medium.

Most people hate the game but have misdirected their vitriol at the player.

I used to be a fierce advocate of online dating myself, but after that relationship ended in getting cheated on — and a nice swirling bowl of anguish and emotional pain for months after that — I took a step back and examined it for both its benefits and faults.

I'm in full alignment with everything you just said, although I'd be apt to swap Torii with Dobson in your descending list of global abhorrence.

You say Clowney, I say Clawney.

In Soviet Russia, Cocks beat you!

From the soldier thingy article:

"Here's some advice, Michele."