“Whoa, there little lady: you can’t expect insurance to cover bells and whistles upgrades, like those breasts and ovaries! Should have gone with the basic model...”

To give you a sense of how much Republican lawmakers care about women, take this vignette from Senator Pat Roberts today. When asked by a TPM reporter if he supported repealing Obamacare, Roberts sarcastically responded, “I wouldn’t want to lose my mammograms.”

Right? And getting back into the workforce TWO MONTHS after having a baby? Yeah, when you have a newborn, you’ve got all the time in the world for searching for a job.

Reminder that penis pumps cost the U.S. government’s Medicare program $172 million between 2006 and 2011, about twice as much as the consumer would have paid at the retail level.

I’d like to see all of these legislatures get 30 stitches in their peritoneums and see how much work they get done 8 weeks later.

Republicans Rule Book...

It also prohibits the use of tax credits for all individuals seeking a COBRA policy that includes abortion coverage after leaving a job, regardless of employer size.

These guys are fucking obsessed with the idea that maternity care and maternity leave is “getting one over on them.” See also: Gorsuch’s comments to his law students about the delicious scam of maternity leave. God forbid they have to help pay for the babies they claim to love and value so much. Women should only…

“Fuck you for asking for birth control! Learn to close to your legs!”

Hoenstly, sometimes I really question Democrats and how they phrase speak about things. Schumer should be screaming this. Schumer should be screaming about how the ACA allowed people to pursue their dream to open small businesses. He should hold news conferences with these people. Have they learned NOTHINGGG????

Seriously. Why the fuck do I have to pay for his testicular cancer screenings? Why do I have to pay for anything that doesn’t affect me directly? I pave my own roads and teach my own schools and put out my own fires too! I AM AN ISLAND AND MY ISLAND HAS NO MAN-PARTS.

If you wanted to go to law school with a kid, you should have been born a man like God intended.

But I thought everything that’s wrong with America is that mothers are out working instead of taking care of the children and the house?

You sell Us Weekly and you keep, what is it, Glixell? Honestly, what the fuck is that?

What I’ve found interesting about the “run government like a business” crowd is they only concentrate on the cost side and never look at ways to increase revenues as well. No business looks just at constant cost cutting.

1. WTH is Glixel?

Ugh. THAT fucking show. “Hey look, he gave that one employee money for her kid to go to college and promoted that other one. He’s the best! Now the rest of you, back to earning that minimum wage.”

And with such delightful characters such as the God Warrior...

It’s the standard hand signal for Aggies (and a way to show off their class rings). It’s called a “Gig ‘em” and it would be pretty much impossible to get elected as SBP if you don’t have a million pictures of yourself doing it. Texas A&M has a lot of esoteric traditions regarding hand signs, greetings, songs, etc.

As we know, the only time it is appropriate for the person who received fewer votes to still win an election is if that person is rich, white, and straight. Otherwise, it’s considered a travesty to the very notion of democracy itself.