I think you misunderstand me, but it’s not a very Goethe joke, is it

The Harvard President will be introducing new behavioral guidelines recommended by her Chief of Staff Mephistopheles. She does so with good intentions and does not anticipate any unforeseen circumstances.

What planet do you inhabit where boys* publish numerical livestock evaluations and detailed descriptions of the “fuckability” of their sports teammates in a crowd-sourced document?

“If the football team did this the school would probably be willing to cancel the soccer season”

You’re right, I shouldn’t be so cynical. If the football team did this the school would probably be willing to cancel the soccer season if they thought it would help.

I think I’ve spotted your mistake- you think it’s a fruit bowl. Bob knows it’s a Bob bowl. Give in and start calling it the Bob bowl. Lookit him sitting there all handsome!

No doubt the penalty would be the same if they played football.

‘They can’t help it, they have penises!’

Waiting for a wealthy Harvard soccer mom to weigh in, “Bu-bu-but boys will be boys!”

Holy mother of pearl. Real consequences to the sports ball game for grossly sexist and dehumanizing behavior.

It’s so unfair when shitty actions have consequences. :(

And yet still, nobody believes rape culture exists on college campuses.

As an American citizen, I did not have an opinion on the duchess until now. Anyone who looks that genuinely happy to be in the presence of a kitty is good in my book.

Judging by that tail, that is not a happy cat... although I wouldn’t blame the Duchess as much as the flash photography...

A happy ginger cat would look something like my Keith here:

Some cats do that when they’re pissed or threatened. Happy tail-wagging is more of a dog thing.

This is my cat Bob. He’s big and lazy and a complete CAT - he does what he wants and does not give one flying fuck if you like it. Example: Bob sitting in the fruit bowl. On the counter. Next to the apples, which we can’t keep in the fruit bowl - because it’s always occupied by Bob’s fuzzy ass.

My cat would have lured her in by giving her belly, then clawed her to fucking pieces when she dared touch the proffered belly.

The partly-closed eyes means the cat is okay with being petted, even enjoying it. The twitching tail says the cat is also irritated, probably at the flashing cameras, in fact I’m surprised he’s not more uncomfortable in his situation. It’s body language, guys, cats aren’t the same as people, they don’t smile and…

Watch out, Duchess.

Oh sure, nobody cares when the Duchess of Cambridge grabs a pussy...