Pensacola is an abyss. I spent the better part of my teens and early twenties there. That place is soooo oppressively Christian. Jesus fish everywhere. First thing people as is “what church do you go to”. Preachers would stand on street corners in the summer screaming about the wages of sin. This was all in the…

This sounds decidedly un-Wiccan. If someone was running around crucifying people, no one would describe the killings as “Catholic” in nature.

“we’ve been able to obtain a photo of the suspects fleeing the crime scene.”

Hmm, remember the last time a police department/sheriff believed that “witchcraft” was the reason for a triple murder? Didn’t turn out so well...

You need like a million stars for this.

Per Morgan: “Here is a screencap of video surveillance of the witches before the murder, planning this fiendish crime.”

How to start your day like Mocena:

I would turn this down in a fucking heartbeat, because otherwise I would never be able to life with myself or sleep at night.

I see where you’re coming from, but a simple “I can’t due to scheduling conflicts” via an agent would more than suffice, I would assume. I think these folks just genuinely want to be in a Woody Allen film more than they give a shit about his alleged history with girls and barely legal daughters of his long-time…

More importantly, why is Parker Posey going to be in this? She should seriously know better.

I’ll be honest with you, Brooke, some white guys called me a nigger bitch and told me the non-consensual things they wanted to do to me.

Re: Hot Pockets/Jason Segel

Same. I am quite sure that the only person giving any of this that much thought is Taylor Swift.

“I’ll be honest with you, I’ve had a black guy call me a honkey and I’ve also been told that white people smell like bologna.” -Brooke Hogan, 2015

Iggy’s plastic surgery looks terrible though. I have nothing against plastic surgery, at all, I have contemplated a nose job after an accident I had when I was 19 left it crooked. But when you start looking like a Real Housewife you might want to stop. Iggy was cute before. This new face looks too plastic.

Netflix has better maternity leave than Canada. Full pay??? Amazing. I am amazed. Would move for you, Netflix. And not just because of the seriousness of our relationship.

This seems an odd comparison. Amy Schumer played a woman who doesn’t know how to make a relationship work, a character that should be familiar to most of us. Melissa McCarthy played a badass spy trapped in the body of an overweight middle-aged woman. Who knows that character in real life? Spy was inherently…

Love the hair. Love the glasses. Love the music.

What do you look like.

That gif is the best thing I've seen in my life up to this point.