What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces.…

PERMIT...... DENIED

Locks.

One of my cats knows how to open doors like a dinosaur in Jurassic Park, except they are normal door knobs. I've just learned to live with it but it's going to be really bad if we ever live with anyone else because bathrooms.

Don't even trust your mother because look at what can happen lol

Nice Emmy..?

Whats funny is that Andrew and I had a conversation about that, and it wasn't immediately obvious. I guess it is now though.

I see the purpose for the design of the T and R...

I truck with the new logo.

Whole article could have been two words: Masturbate everywhere.

I can eat dinner over the kitchen sink every day! It's awesome.

She realized she was on camera. She just didn’t have the self control to hold back the vitriol once she got going. Can you imagine how she treats the people in her life?

Waiting for the update that she’s just been hired at Fox News

This might be from when she got her car towed from ole’ Hunan One and it was covered in the local blog regarding overzealous towing in Arlington.

You know, Deloreans weigh less than 2800lbs.

RIP, John DeLorean.

I hope they can rinse all that santorum off of it.

Awesome thanks! I was afraid the question was walking the fine line between ass-hole and excellent question.

I'm waiting for Tavarish to tell you what you could've bought instead in 3...2...1...

Jeez - looks like someone's neighbor bought a new Escalade.