Drunk as a skunk, claim it was a deer!

Imagine if Verizon didn’t literally own the FCC how much trouble they would be in.  But they do.  Until November.  Then they have to take their village idiot back.

The multiplayer was way better than the single player. Which isn’t great on primarily a single player game. Good co-op fun.

Note: marathoning five seasons of Air Disasters suddenly not a great choice when you are taxing for takeoff and your brain helpfully points out “this is when we are most likely to die!”

“Meh” has its valid use case- when someone is trying to get you outraged about something insipid or making a huge deal out of something that doesn’t really matter. Deploy that “Meh” with the appropriate shrug. Like when someone try’s to win a point citing John Hodgeman- NPR’s 70th best comedian.

As the target market for this is competitive athletes who are training pretty seriously, maybe Gizmodo should have one review this. An Apple Watch doesn’t work for that market- the battery life is too short, and they are not for multi-sport in general. Its like complaining a Ford F250 Super Duty is poor at autocross.…

It worked for Hamilton at Mercedes, and now he basically runs the team and makes Toto carry his luggage. Its charming- especially when Hamilton craps all over the team over the radio when he’s not in first. The camera cut to the pit box where Toto’s will to live is leaving him in real time is a real highlight of late…

Facebook: “We have tried nothing, and we’re all out of ideas!”

This is the before in every cross-fit ad.

He will cry himself to sleep on a giant pile of money he gets despite not being all that good at his job. Then get fired, then scupper off to college football to get overpaid to coach at a PAC-10 school.

Not really, we will get ignored all the way to the grave. We are stuck between the Boomers and Millennials- so we might as well not exist.  The 90's were pretty cool though, so we have that working for us, which is nice. 

Can we stop pretending this is a car. Its a jet without wings, and about as relevant as Truckasaurus is to anything automotive. Its not automobiles done well, its aviation done poorly. #getoffmylawn

Keep Failing up Johan. Just because you were a disaster at both jobs that you had any real input and control in doesn’t mean you won’t suck this time. Ha ha- that just dry German humor, your the last live body we could find not tainted by Dieselgate!

I hope Drew is getting royalties out of this. 

Once the writers decided half the cast was secret Cylons, the shark was cleared by the leather jacketed water skier.

Jesus, that was a kill shot on New Jersey. Go ahead and cue up the “stop he’s dead already” Simpsons meme. 10/10, utter perfection.

Good luck finding one even at MRSP- demand is way over supply for these (and was last year too).

And now its in my head. . .

Hi Cheryl, Not sure if you were joking,

Dear Deadspin: Intervention time; The constant Simmons stuff sounds way too much like “Notice Me Sempei!”. Its unseemly. Given the rather dire Deadspin ownership issues (sorry about that, you guys deserve better) I understand your obsession with Simmons and the Ringer.  But its not a good look.  Maybe stick with…