Stop it. Stop it, you two!!! I have to work, and I can't stop laughing. 

7. (Not) Welcome to My Home by the Sea

4. Another Day in MiamiDade

Alternate sign-offs:

Somehow I’ve never tried barbecue (it just sounded more boring than the other ones)

Mardi Gras Mustard is the one true sauce from Popeyes. Panama, fix ya listicle.

That sweet heat sauce though.  I don’t ever want anything else.

Are those grilled tenders?!

Cajun Sparkle.

Back in the day, Popeye’s used to serve their nuggets/tenders not only with sauce, but this little sugar packet of something called Cajun Spice that you could add to the sauce and make it more spicy and cajunlicious. I loved that shit so much that even though I had leftover Cajun Spice in that tore-off packet, I saved…

“Dear Salty - I like to grab my server’s tatas and make a honking noise while they read the daily specials. Should I tip extra because of this?”

I’m going to refer to the bill at a restaurant as the “invoice” from now on.

Definitely thought I was special until I got to the greens question and saw where this was going. What’s good Regulars..

“Plus, in my childhood household, parents really didn’t want us to speak to them “like we’re your little friends”.”

Word with a side of 100. Yeah, I know every word to every song on Aja. And I turn “Peg” up LOUD, too.

49...I’m some kind of ish...

To be honest with you, it was a moment from an ordinary day, during 6th (or maybe, it was in the 7th grade), when I was accused of “wanting to be white” by a black classmate because I did speak with very little AAVE or the current popular slang, at the time. Since the tail end of puberty, my voice changed into what I…

I’ve got an extra jar of mayonnaise, if you have a hankering.

Exceptional-ish :)