It's Maccy D's in the UK...

I got one!

I'm 4ft 11 but have never had a boyfriend less than 6ft (6ft 8 is my record!)

last time I went to buy a car I had my boyfriend with me. I know far more about cars than he does (I owned a mini that broke down a lot. Inconvenient, but I learned so much!)

That actually sounds quite nice! Unfortunately this bloke is a narcissistic psychopath. I think that's why the story was so unexpected - the whole company was primed and waiting for one of his epic rants (which he would have us film and send to overseas offices)

David Brent ;)

I died of secondhand embarrassment at the whole thing. He was so into it, but it was terrible. 50 Shades of Grey levels of technical ability.

My boss sat the entire company down one morning in the boardroom for a very important meeting.

Jordan is my second cousin! Super weird.

were you sitting in the bath too?!

I'd had my 'issues' since I was 11. They were me and I was them. I did feel a little lost without them.

It did for me. I can pinpoint the exact moment and I was 27.

This is horrific. Please tell me you can get proper cakes too? I know you excluded seasonal ones, but Cadbury's mini egg cakes are available to you, right?

I get this.