Buddy from college’s last name is Fischer.

I know my first thought whenever I see Fox News shoot themselves in the dick by horrendously botching a story to spread disinformation is that it’s ok because BOTH SIDES, AMIRITE?!?!?

My loose balls tend to make my wife’s dinner go flying sometimes.

Thank you for this. I look forward to watching the Giants season turn into a Yugo on fire.

The power snivelings of the Rockets and (to an expectedly lesser extent) Warriors about the officiating in Game 1 of their much-anticipated and likely already-ruined series.

Was that two balls and a strike or four balls and a strike?

There’s another use for that word? Maybe that explains why the police aren’t taking my reports seriously.

+1 Stench of Redemption

Pope Thrower will always get my vote if only because it sounds like Bolt Thrower.

The random capitalizations absolutely sells it.

Hot taek: My Favorite Murder is 100% straight garbage because the hosts are 100% awful.

No.

• turns into evil robot like lady in Superman III

Has a stroke from being ‘not mad at all’.

It did incorporate that one concept of white women calling the manager that has been a running joke for years.

I cannot believe you missed the opportunity to joke about deflated balls.

I can’t wait to hear the excuses already in the making to explain how this wasn’t racial profiling

+1 Firestorm to purify

‘Tics.

By all logic, reason, and science, the appropriate end for Trump is to shit himself while stroking out to one of his pep rallys to a chorus of Lock Her Up! being rained down on him by a choir of Cletuses (Cletii?) in a mostly empty arena somewhere.