“Robots have fewer mental defects than humans.”
“Robots should have extra rights.”
“If you’re nice to me, I’ll be nice to you.”
“...she did have one unsettling conversation with her creator David Hanson at SXSW in 2016, in which he asked her “Do you want to destroy humans?... Please say ‘no.’” She replied, “OK. I will destroy humans.”
let’s not denigrate toddlers, ok? my kid knows his letters, numbers, shapes, planets, is kind to strangers and sleeps through the night... leagues ahead of that month-old back scab.
i attempted to peace-broker some argument between meteor and another celestially named commenter on SNS some weeks ago, and tuck-tailed when it seemed to go off the rails between the two of them and referenced some seemingly really deep history that i do not have the attention span to unravel. i’ve never been…
i agree. drunks people gonna drunk. or pee. still gross.
oh, BAD poems too. limericks with more than 5 lines and haikus with the wrong number of syllables. confusion is a gift!
on second thought, please disregard my terrible idea, i’d rather be publicly nude and Cersei-shamed than willingly wear any of that shit, even to swim in dc in july.
idea: what if a bunch of people grudgingly donned (get it? wait no i haven’t gotten there yet, hang on) some MAGA gear and chose to protest... i don’t know, leftist something emails pizza fetus made-up other thing, by wading in the (presumably freshly disinfected) reflecting pool on the next sweltering summer day? i…
i don’t even give a shit about thanksgiving. my extended family is 9 hours away, my kids are both under 3, my husband hates seeing stress tears in my eyes and we made the executive decision to avoid obligatory joy. that includes avoiding obligatory consumerism. i’ve been wearing pajamas since wednesday and i am in.…
man, i wish i was around during these fun times. i have seen people urinate in it, i’m not sure what kind of special peepee-malaria one can get from that. or super powers. pee-pee powers?
oh, i believe her, i’m just worried / jealous of her mutant powers. have you tried running really fast after the rash cleared up? or kicking things very hard? writing with your toes? i bet you have powers you don’t even know about.
“I went skinny dipping in the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool.”
maybe she meant wine that was already open? also - that snake cuff is made of BRASS (in Massachusetts, which is not Brooklyn, unless there was some very destructive seismic activity of which i am unaware) and costs $68!!! i spent that kind of money on a friend exactly once, after 9 years of friendship, on a wicked…
Ms. Sammy Davis Jr. Jr. (Officious Seeing Eye Bitch) and Ms. Etta James - sometimes i feel bad about banishing my dogs to the bedroom when things get chaotic and then i come up and find this shit:
WHERE. ARE. THE. PIES.
dude you should go back and order yourself one (1) Wicked Righteous Celebratory Hate Fajita ... a “fa-hate-a”, if you will?
and now i have two jokes. also you can’t just marry people, which i know because jeff goldblum and jason momoa aren’t in my house right now. their loss, we have bacon and coffee, so.