I’m pretty sure the phone call was actually Sarah Huckabee Sanders pretending to be Carmen Yulin Cruz.

Yep.

The government did try to spin that HMS Ocean has arrived in the region - two hurricanes after it could really have been useful. If Boris Johnson paid half as much attention to his remit as Foreign Secretary as he did scheming and writing 4000 words for The Telegraph he’d be - well he wouldn’t be Boris would he?

Sorry, but these things do make history books.

Hating the Patriots is not biased, it’s just good sense.

But he doesn’t. He lives in a country that believes in freedom of speech.

Someone else said it much better than I.

Don’t be this guy.

Consider it a mark of just how far America has fallen, and so quickly, that The Shrub is now considered a liberal political voice. Just take a moment and think on that. While you are thinking, I’ll get the whiskey ready for you.

It’s interesting that Buffalo’s kicker is so left leaning in his beliefs, considering their most famous kicker is best known for how far right he is.

How fucked up is it North Korea says they’re going to continue their nuclear weapon testing in part because the POTUS is a total fucking loon, and I have to concede that they have a pretty strong point.

Nazi hunters or Nazi hunters?

And every time she thought she was finished, another Columbo would appear and say, “Just one more thing....”

Don’t do it my Friend: Wine isn’t the answer. You are going to wake up from this and still remember the horrible shit that went down at the U.N yesterday.....

Get out now. Before it’s too late. It’s hard but necessary. I ditched more than one lovely but vanilla girl like that and eventually met a girl who roots for the same teams as I do, watches comic book movies and tv shows with me, and also has enough going on with her life with her friends. Married 24 years.

You know what a girl with no hobbies makes her hobby? You. She’s sweet but dull and wants to “be with you” all the time, which will result in weekends spent having brunch and puttering around crappy street fairs and those awful craft towns like New Hope. She doesn’t really have any friends, she just has drinks with…

Theory: She had one in mind, but it’s something intense and involved (“I carve marble busts of assassinated world leaders”) and when he presented his totally banal list (“I enjoy breathing and looking at things that are in front of me”) she panicked and gave up.

Shit, I’m a Packers fan, I have to look at him 16-19 times a year.

The Cornhuskers failed to realize that DeKalb, Illinois, is (no, really) a couple of buildings surrounded by endless corn.

It’s a set of frustrations, really. It’s that their stupidity seems literally bottomless, when I thought there was a category called “could not be more stupid” – and there just seems to be no end to them, when I was operating under the general illusion (I’m admitting it, okay) that our general populace was much better…