Regarding their take on the IC, it's not unprecedented for right-leaners to champ at the bit to criticize the government for doing their job when doing so is the rhetorical equivalent of licking a Republican president's boots.

That was the crux of … was it Friedman's article in the NYT? That Trump and Conway blab and bully so much and in such a boastful way because they're fundamentally, stupendously insecure, while the reason we don't hear so much if at all from Bannon is that he knows how influential he is to the administration and…

He looks like he got hit in the face with a football.

Raises the same red flags as when "his" tweets contain spaced em dashes — typed out as two regular dashes, like that? Formatted in textbook AP style, using the double dash as you would on a typewriter or a word processor that automatically replaces two dashes with an em dash?

Nah, Mattis was a Corpsman. If he didn't gut Bannon with Ka-Bar, he'd do it with a rifle bayonet — while it was attached to the rifle.

Oh, those disgusting amateur porno sites! There are so many of them, though. Which one?

Yeah, but that wouldn't be "Sad!"

This guy, like everyone else who's recently moved into the American government, is an idiot. They're all idiots. I would know, because I've been trying to have conversations with them for the past two months. A fruitless pursuit, I tell you what.

Something something bleeding out of her wherever wherever something something.

It's not too bad. But maybe I'm speaking from bias, because there's a soft spot in my heart for "Garden State" for the sole reason that my first serious girlfriend is/was almost a spitting image of circa-2004 Natalie Portman.

"I'm really into this band called Run-Ning. They're local to Allston, kinda obscure. You probably never heard of them."

Surely, you can't be serious.

Oh yeah. He's a fucking … a schemer and a killer.

Both Tilda Swinton and Margaret Cho, apparently, because they exchanged a mere six emails and amicably called it quits.

To be fair, most actors I know are stage actors or trained to be stage actors, so maybe it's a theater thing?

I'm sorry, but there's no way you can say that those articles deliver any substantive reporting.

Oh, this is legit oversharing. Oversharing, plus with all that baggage of what used to be our utopian global information community slowly marching toward a point where it's just totally normal to just forward .zips of your email archives to anyone without half a thought.

Of course it isn't. It's poop. Troll poop. Big ol' enormous longform troll poop.

Oh good fucking lord, will you jerks please just stop pooping on me!?

I vented a little bit above, but holy shit. Ragging on someone who went through amphetamine psychosis, pretending it's some enlightening … what? On account of they had a social media breakdown in the throes of speed and alcohol? That's 100 percent fucked.