I never knew that my vag was a timey wimey thing. I should have guessed, though, because it does go "ding!" when there's stuff.

I usually use a combination of menstrual blood and glitter pens, but never on cardboard - my menses and my husband deserve quality vellum. He's in for quite a scroll tonight!

Ugh, yes. "But it's helpful advice!" people always give their helpful advice like I've never fucking thought about it before. There's a lot of misogynist bullshit that hinges on the idea that women have never thought about their safety, or their futures, or their bodies, until someone gives us 'helpful advice.'

It's good to know that my rape will come with a receipt including my rapist's name and photo. I'll share this journey in real time with friends and loved ones!

Oh fuck. I'm sobbing, but kind of smiling, then sobbing again, at the last line of her last blog entry:

Needs more stars. I keep trying to come up with something more, but I end up with *sigh*. I'm just so tired of that 'aggressively proclaim my own goodness' thing, especially on a thread like this. I don't care how good of a Christian you are - Her parents' Christianity, their church, their religion-approved…

Not the grossest I've heard, but easily one of the funniest and most memorable.

You're right, they'd shit their stupid misandry diapers if a women's blog posted something like that. SEE, THE FEMINAZIS HATE MEN AND WANT TO KILL US OR MAKE US SPERM SLAVES WITH THEIR MATRIARCHAL OPPRESSION.

Holy shit. I was initially just laughing at this guy, but he sounds truly dangerous, especially to his children. He explicitly threatens to stalk and murder them. Whenever he is (seems to be Germany?) I hope local authorities are investigating these threats, and taking them seriously. How the fuck can he threaten…

But you can probably pronounce "Worcester" correctly!

What's with that satiny motherfucker who wishes he was John Waters?

That cops have effective safety and defensive equipment(and those are good things. They should have those) doesn't change the numbers. You think loggers and garbage collectors don't also have safety training and equipment? The studies aren't based on "deadliest jobs for some naked, bewildered clone we grew…

I've got a 2x3' chunk of the wall at Woodstock '99 lying around in my parents' storage unit. I really want there to be a Jezebel contest for most pathetic novelty trinket. Impromptu submissions, go!

Haha, yes, that's exactly me. I'm always amazed at my friends who can follow conversations, plots, or play video games or something. Or cook! "No cooking while high, plan snacks ahead of time" is one self-imposed rule I have to follow, because if I didn't, I'd probably burn my apartment down. There's a terribly…

I'm not sure what the secret is, but I've had pot brownies and mushroom fudge before, and both actually tasted excellent (I was especially amazed that I couldn't taste the mushrooms. Those things are fucking nasty). We tried to re-create the fudge once on our own, and it came out worse than just eating them plain. …

Totally agree. I know plenty of people who function perfectly well when a little high, and I don't mind people smoking it around me at all, but one or two hits for me? I'm toast, and tend to want to be alone and just listen to music or watch TV (which is nice sometimes. It's not like I never do it. I just usually…

OT a bit, but I used to lifeguard at a water park. They're fun, but disgusting (you're lucky if it's only urine). "Code brown" meant someone pooped in one of the pools or walkways, and if you cleaned it up, you got a brown bead for your whistle lanyard. Because that's something you want to advertise to your…

Oh, haha! Yeah, I was talking about that scene. "I know you won't hurt me." "You know nothing, Jon Snow" Arrow arrow arrow, sniffle sniffle. I wouldn't post any spoilers without lots of warning.

Oh crap. But, literally, their future just involves arrows, and that's not giving much away. You really know nothing, LuckyStampede (You don't, in this case. I'm not just being cheeky!). (I'm sorry! I just assume that everyone has at least seen the previous season, but I also know how much I hate spoilers).

I think it's partially a defense mechanism. Frozen is crazy popular, and if you're in any proximity to children, you're going to hear it all the time anyway. ALL THE TIME. So why not spoof it with 'Fuck it All' and 'Game of Thrones'? I mean, I love my little sister, but after her 10th rendition of the day, I'm…