Imagine the horror when they’re forced to assemble cheap furniture with only pictographic instructions and a hex key.

I believe he can lie.

Even Patriots fans can’t stand Patriots fans.

“Is this another attempt by Gyllenhaal to prove he’s a Serious Actor?”

“Not now. Can’t you see I’m busy doing deals?!”

Criticizes Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez for wearing nice clothes.

Can’t understand why Tucker Carlson changed his look, but still his #1 fan.

Tolerates husbands frequent gay affairs, as long as he keeps her enveloped in dead-animal pelts.

Spends hedge-fund millions on buttered caviar, won’t pay for college for his kids.

Just look at all these assholes. A room full of people without a redeeming quality among them.

Guess a movie doesn’t begin at conception either.

Look, up in the sky! It’s a bird! (No.) It’s a plane! (Ehhh.)

“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

So, literally the Hershey Highway?

My dad died when I was a teenager. He had cancer. He was the best father for 17 years and I wouldn’t trade my time with him for 70 years with any other father your comment is offensive.

Last of the Nokians

I pictured ACME on the side

Oh God, Curt Schilling is logging into the Internet right now.

Every time she expressed hesitation or said she wasn’t comfortable with something, he stopped. She doesn’t try to leave until the end and he doesn’t stop her. Instead he calls her an Uber. Also, she’s a grown adult too and doesn’t seem like she was forced into anything. Being inconsiderate is not the same thing as…

I hope Bruce Springsteen offers to play at Phil Murphy’s swearing in.