The whole “moral imperative to entertain me” notion people seem to have about their favorite pop culture is fucking gross. He’s a fucking abusive piece of shit, that’s a lot worse than his having made your least favorite fucking x-men movie.

Sure. But if the incident happened/did not happen 40 years ago, and he does not remember it, what else could he say?

As a fellow Midwesterner let me tell you that the introduction of French’s fried jalapeños has revolutionized my hot dish cookery.

And it was a hideously inappropriate thing to say about ANYONE, let alone a minor. It doesn’t matter if a person is closeted or wears a Lesbian Avenger tee shirt every day, public speculation about their sexuality is gross and wrong.

Sad story time: I love green bean casserole (GBC). Yup, I’m a lapsed Midwesterner who was raised on a steady diet of random hot dishes, meat, and potatoes. Anyway, I always put those little French fried onions on my GBC. They’re delicious. They’re crunchy. They’re all around good. I, too, enjoy a bag of Funyuns every…

Cripes, these damn hipsters. Yes, nothing is more relaxing and less tension-filled than FARMING. I think it’s in the top ten most dangerous and stressful careers!

The Swedish Chef felt me up.

Uh, also can you call it an apology if he never, not once said he was sorry but did find a way to talk about how admired he is twice?

You’ve never been bitten by a horse, have you?

A thoroughbred horse that kills and eats humans (mostly jockeys) would be a great horror movie. I would watch it.

One good thing about being from Eastern Oregon Redneck stock, my dad would have known exactly how to handle that situation and Rand Paul would have a new roommate.

I was all set to star the bejeezus out of this, and then you had to throw in the “horse laugh” remark at the end. Star retracted.

The jockey, Dylan Caboche, was riding She’s Reneldasgirl

It a typical incident in the world of sports, isn’t it? Just like American football: it’s rarely the guy that starts the fight that draws the flag. You can bet that horse said something to set that jockey off, and judging by the reaction it was something pretty damn personal. What must really piss off the jokey,…

My apology goes to the horse’s connections, my fellow jockeys, Thoroughbred Racing SA, the racing public and to the wider community in general.

English teacher moment: “hurtling,” not “hurdling.” Unless the plane was leaping over fixed barriers, which would use up all the little paper bags.

Not to mention her parents were in the room...I think we’re looking a little too hard for outrage in this case.

You’d also think that, being Texas with its open carry laws, there would have been plenty of good guys with guns ready to stop this. Maybe that whole narrative is a bunch of crap as well.

Man, if anywhere was going to have a magical bulletproof blanket of thoughts and prayers, it’d be a church on Sunday morning. I’m starting to get the sense that maybe those thoughts and prayers aren’t working as intended.