There is little in this world that is more infuriating than a power-tripping bureaucrat unwilling to listen to common sense.

I gave my daughter an extra big hug today and told her I don't care about who she comes home with or as as long as she's happy and safe and loved.

I honestly just feel sorry for this woman, because she's lost something beautiful, but she's too limited to ever really know it.

My first time I started bussing tables in a restaurant. I didn't work there.

I find this delightful. My definite favorite so far.

Tom Bissell says that cocaine doesn't exaggerate personalities, it italicizes them. So you must make a mean sandwich any day of the week.

The "You can shave the baby" doll was never actually sold. It was created as an art object, and only 10 of them exist.

Hahahaha that reminds me of the first time I did coke. I, straight up, cleaned a stranger's house.

Because it has a glandular condition. Don't be rude.

This is the most cocaine of all cocaine stories. I love it.

Coke'll do that.

Now I'm just imagining someone high on coke yelling "let's make some fucking sandwiches!"

For me, it's a tossup between Times Square in open toe heels or a fivesome without condoms.

If only there had been a good guy with a gun there to shoot that baby.

Thanks. I actually did donate my wedding dress after I got divorced.

These are some of the best wedding photos I've seen.

They are like greenhouse flowers, rarely if ever able to thrive in the wild.

Hating is the beating heart of the Internet. I like to do my part.

do none of these guys wear underwear? My husband's junk doesn't stick to his thighs because there is fabric in the way.