I can absolutely see why so many people are confused:

DONT TAZE ME BRO!

Maybe this is a generational divide, but I assumed “written it down immediately” meant the Notes app on his phone. Because no, people don’t usually bring a pen and paper into a Portapotty these days.

The fact that it’s a bikini/Hooters-style shop is KIND OF IMPORTANT TO THE STORY, WRITER. At least in helping readers realize that the customer is, you know...that guy.

I will never be able to figure out why wealthy celebrities get regularly busted for DUI/DWI. This isn’t Joe Normalguy who gets blitzed but still needs to get his car home somehow to get to his day job. It’s a terrible idea, but you can put the dots together on the (drunk)decision-making process that leads to some…

“that includes the ability to separate his personal views from his television persona. (YMMV whether that’s a good or bad quality to have.)”

All of the above, final answer

You could very easily find several songs from White Album, Everything Will Be Alright in the End, or OK Human more essential than “Beverly Hills” or “Africa.” You could slot in “Across the Sea” or “The Greatest Man That Ever Lived” or “Can’t Knock the Hustle.” This list acts like Weezer stopped making music in 2010…

I’m sorry. But Beverly Hills is NOT essential Weez. It’s barely tolerable. 

...sorry, are you suggesting that because Big Mouth exists, people are wrong if they suggest that [project X made back in the day] couldn’t be made today? That doesn’t really follow, does it? Yes, it’s MUCH easier now to get something with a lot of vulgarity or “explicit” aspects, but that’s clearly not what she’s…

Social Media creates viral celebrities fairly regularly. In such an environment, can ywe really pretend that the world of comedy is some kind of walled garden that only straight white men can succeed in? Um, there are plenty of highly successful “marginalized” comics in the industry and there is no need to take part…

I’m just confused on this “his” decisions and “my” decisions regarding large financial decisions. I know not all married couples have combined finances, but the idea that a married person makes such a big financial decision in a vacuum is just silly. If you have your car repo’ed and your credit score takes a big hit,…

Now I’m not so sorry his mother blew up.

No permanent Double Decker? Not interested. I will die on this fucking hill.

We all have a favorite pot, pan, spatula or bowl...this is nothing more than a story about someone’s favorite and having worked in restaurants back in the day I see the point of the story.  I don’t know if it is worthy of an article but maybe it’s a slow day, and I cannot imagine what being a creative type with a…

The collective AV Club hate campaign against this dude is unprecedented.

Quizno’s does have some slightly more interesting options, like chipotle turkey, turkey bacon guac, turkey ranch swiss, and ultimate turkey club, but finding a Quizno’s still near you might be the hard part.

Oh I get it, I’m just saying it sounds weird. When you see it written out like that. And are stoned. 

Imagine writing this list as if Cliff Huxtable is the Daddist TV dad.