Ryan Lochte and his swimming team buddies being douchebags doesn’t change the fact that Brazil is one corrupt-as-fuck country with a corrupt-as-fuck police force, which is why everyone was willing to buy the original story in the first place.

The only answer that was ever needed is “Because he is a fucking moron”.

THAT SHITHOLE OF A COUNTRY IS HARRASSING AMERICAN HEROES - everyone here yesterday

At least we have moved from pissing all over South America with our foreign policy to actually pissing all over South America.

A bronzed god with silver hair issues forth a golden shower.

Trump will probably name him as his first choice for Ambassador to Brazil before the week is over.

Not the idiot we want, but the idiot we deserve.

Well, Lochte might not be a good representative of America, but at least he’s an accurate one.

Lochte is 32 in HUMAN years. He’s only like a teenager in mermaid years.

Oh shit. So (its possible) that this thing just spiralled out of control & its point of origin was Lochte (like me) just giving his mom some over the top lame excuse to get out of a longer conversation that you dont want to have with your mom.

Jeaheez Mom! Now my friends have to stay in Brazilian jail, thanks a lot. Also, I don’t even like the cherry fruit roll ups you got me, you’re the worst!

Holy shit. IOC spokesman is really angling for a new job as Sports Information Director for an SEC school.

My dad just showed me pictures from a recent cruise he took around the Caribbean. In one photo he casually mentioned “this isn’t our boat, but it was parked next to ours.” It was the Freewinds. He had no idea what I meant when I started yelling “OMG it’s the Scientology boat!!”

I am Mexican and I never watch Univision.

First, you’re forgetting how many people share The Onion thinking it’s real. Second, it’s been around for decades. It started as an actual printed publication written by some clever nerds in Madison. The Onion will survive Deadspin.

When I saw this trending (and the people who I knew tweeting) I thought it was Justin Trudeau and political parties.

I remember when Billy Bush was a humble radio dj in the md/dc/va area. I liked him a lot back then, he seemed like a nice enough guy. I’m glad that he snagged that Ryan Lochte interview because I find the Today show cast completely unlikeable.