When I was in college in wrote a post about how every dance movie is exactly the same. Wish I could find it now...

I’m sure there will be glitches to work out ( which they even said themselves) but I doubt they would have set up a texting system without someone qualified to intercept and act upon those texts. At any rate, they’re actually trying to do something positive unlike the majority of bands or people in general. It’s easy…

Um, I don’t know how to break this to you, but your friend actually is dumb.

I had a pretty blonde friend who spoke flawless Japanese. I was with her on an elevator in a Century City office building when some Japanese businessmen boarded and began speaking to one another. They were making bold remarks about our physicality, etc. My friend gave them a beautifully formal “Please have a lovely…

Word. I have a friend who is planning on a home birth and I know she judges my decision to go to a hospital. With doctors. But I still can’t figure out how that is a bad thing. She also plans to have her placenta made into pills (which has no research base) and her baby wears amber beads to help ease the pain of…

I didn’t even want to see that shit in the hospital. I believe they told me that was the placenta and I said, “Great, please get it the fuck out of here.”

When I was 19 I worked at Starbucks in San Francisco part time while attending a bullshit excuse for an art school (Art Institute of California, San Francisco if anyone is curious). The manager of the Starbucks was gay and while flirty and chatty with the young male baristas, tended to act coldly or indifferently…

I feel so naive for being surprised by this.

ETA: The fuckin weird hippie/yuppie-driven culture that has developed around birth has achieved apotheosis. Now, people, please stop trying to out-weird all of the other crazy ladies and just have your baby in semi-normal circumstances with modern medical advances as at…

I do not want to be diving and come across some lunatic’s placenta. Seriously.

Free childcare is not just a food service perk. When I was a newbie attorney one of the partners would bring her toddler to the office when her daycare closed and expect the young attorneys to babysit for her until she decided to go home. Now the only reason the young attorneys are still in the office long after…

You think you’re entitled to hit on women you work with, asshole. Case closed.

“But why would you “crack down” on someone complimenting your shirt or making a positive comment about your attractiveness? How are men who are attracted to you supposed to communicate that to you?”

My dad memorably contested a ticket where they sent him two photos that clearly show his car going through a red light, and him clearly behind the wheel. And he contests.

When I worked at a movie theater, I had a boss so cheap that he wouldn’t let us throw out the hot dogs that had been revolving on that stupid carousel all day at the end of the night. We had to stick them in the fridge and put them back on the rack the next day...and every day after that until they looked like…

I try to take good care of someone else's stuff because they didn't have to let me use it. That is the decent thing to do.

Or when they treat the borrowed item like trash because it’s not theirs.

Many years ago and fresh out of college I worked for Pizza Hut. I was a hard worker and caught on quickly, so the manager I had decided to promote me to a shift manager. This meant that I had limited authority over staff and would do some end of day admin work like bank deposits etc. This worked well for a while until…

That is like the better version of when people would make sexist/racist/rapey jokes to me, and I “wouldn’t get them” and ask for a detailed explanation of the joke. Halfway through, their faces would indicate, “oh, this is a terrible joke that I SHOULDN’T be telling strangers because it says a whole lot about me.”…

Regarding the first story, I really hate when you do someone a favor by letting them borrow something they assume that they always have access to that item. If I want to help you out okay but when it starts to infringe on me then it’s not. That is just rude.

I was bullied into signing a form and made to promise that I would not seek medical attention.