I seriously laughed hard at this.

I have a lot of siblings. A lot. Enough to form a baseball team. Dh and I have one spawn. We like it like this way because we want to focus on one child and not spread ourselves thin. Both of our families want us to have more. Uhmm no. Just because I popped one out first does not mean I’m a baby factory. It really…

I’ve grown up with guns. Gun safety was taught before kindergarten in my home. Husband is an active duty military Afghanistan vet that builds guns and reloads bullets as a hobby. We have had multiple times where a piece of shit tweeker has tried to break in or just walk into our house. Pepper spray has no effect on…

I have a huge rock (thanks to the magic of cz) and you can’t miss the fucker. It’s blinding. But nope. It’s definitely a challenge. Even when I was pregnant and it looked like I was smuggling a basketball the sleezes came out. When my husband was around, looks identical to Jonathan Rhys Meyers, not a soul bothered me.…

Mid twenties mom here! Ours wasn’t expected at all. Huge surprise but we made it work. Husband has a very busy career and I’m medical school. I may be torn to pieces for this but we’re blown away by people that have babies later in life. We are young but thankfully have the energy for the shit storm we call life. We…

Flares for life! I never understood skinny jeans. I dance so I have muscular legs, a booty. No. Just no. They look hideous.

Oh my god. I can’t even... *throws up hands and sashays out*

Thank you. My husband is the best NCO and they don’t make them like him anymore. His biggest headache are the other NCO’s that step on everyone’s neck to get ahead or to not cause waves. He’s so sick of those spineless needle dicks.

Thank you. A rabid shark is the stuff of nightmares.

My husband is in the army and he always goes rabid shark on his soldiers if they look at a woman wrong. He shuts that shit down real quick. He’s like, “First of all she’s a human being and not a plaything for your amusement! She’s trying to do her job and serve like the rest of us. Don’t ruin my army and be a goddamn…

Also remember to breathe! I am the worst with that. I hold my breath and tense up. Breathe damn it! Lol

I’m fixing my back piece with a more intricate version of the original. Holy balls it hurts. The first time it was a breeze but time changes your body. Everyone is different. Thankfully I was given a stress ball to squeeze. Definitely eat. My body is evil and pain killers have no effect on me. It really helps that my…

Same guys who wanted Juice from Sons of Anarchy for “betraying” the club. Still mad because he was my eye candy. Don’t judge me.

I am really getting pissed off about these crunchy moms and their criticism of women that don’t everything natural. Don’t jump my case but I feel like it’s ridiculous to not use a doctor and their experience to try to prove something. Back in the day women dreamed of giving birth in a sanitized environment with…

I loved my epidural. :)

Squats dear. All the squats.

I was raped from 5 to 17 by family and never received counseling. Some people need it and some don’t. I highly recommend it but I have never personally felt I needed it. Yes, I sometimes have horrific nightmares but I don’t really feel like my past currently effects the present other than my being hyper aware and…

Hold out for a little longer. I am studying with many men and women that are coming into the field that are appalled by such archaic beliefs. We’re just waiting for the old farts to retire. We’re coming. We’re coming and hoping to usher in a new era of freedom. Just hold on for a little longer.

I swear when I’m an obgyn with my own practice I will make sure all of my patients get the care they need. I will also have a very pro choice staff. Thank you for your great work. You’re not alone. I promise you that.

Yesterday my mother called me and talked about this shithead and how we should forgive him because Jesus. She went on a rampage about how abortion, homosexuality and rape are sins. I pretend to be a Christian so she can have a relationship with my daughter. So I said in a cold tone, “first off you know I had an…