“Was that really the best Peter Parker image you could find”

Nah man. You got it all wrong. You just have to read it like Dennis Miller is giving the review.

Yeah. I mean - even - if the choices are LITERAL NUCLEAR APOCALYPS, or Bill assaulting corpses and using charities to pay people to look the other way - the choice should be clear.

For what? ... ... ... Well... If one gets in, you *might* not ever have to worry about getting to sleep again. Ever. Sadly - that’s not even rhetoric.

“I think as a society we are not rotten”

“Now you’re officially my woman. Kudos! I can’t say I don’t envy you”

How about... “My strategy is so simple and idiot could have devised it.”

That could be a new game - Quote by Trump or Zapp... Or Trump/Zapp bingo

I’d gather he’d build a golf course like the Wongs.

Like a “The Truman Show” / “Apprentice” mashup. Sounds good. Have it on global pay-per view, deficit will be a surplus in no time.

“I’ve never heard of such a brutal and shocking injustice that I cared so little about!”

“What are you? Gay?”

“We know nothing about them, their language, their history or what they look like. But we can assume this. They stand for everything we don’t stand for. Also they told me you guys look like dorks.”

“In the game of chess you can never let your adversary see your pieces.”

*Suicide-botters?

Fry: “I heard one time you single-handedly defeated a horde of rampaging somethings in something-something-stan”
Brannigan: “ISIS-bots. A trifle. It was simply a matter of outsmarting them.”
Fry: “Wow, I never would’ve thought of that.”
Brannigan: “You see, ISIS-bots have a preset kill limit. Knowing their weakness, I…

I just love how repeating exactly what a candidate says; not even needing to twist it out of context, distort, or infer meaning, is taken as an unjust biased political attack against said candidate and is unfair media manipulation. “Proper” mudslinging requires distortion and half truths! Um, apparently.

Chicago? Are we sure it's not a pizza? That has cheese in it.