And they don’t look a day under 370 years old.

“More Vampire than Vampire” would be the perfect title for a new song should White Zombie ever get back together.

Try Everything, indeed.

It’s pretty difficult to make a movie about French people when they repeatedly spawn during cutscenes.

Let me fix that headline for you:

He should cut to the chase and sue himself.

At this point, Kanye West feels more like a parody of himself than his South Park character.

Can we call it DUN€?

I could see a horror revival where Tim “The Toolman” Taylor slowly tortures his victims with power tools. Wilson eventually sees what’s happening and turns him in to the police.

Doubtful. We all know how serious a marihuana addiction is, Mr. Dogg will be shooting up again within days.

Yeah, but how much did he have to pay the writers to come up with this statement?

Paul McCartney may also know a thing or two about being bigger than Jesus.

No, my son. Faith is what makes everything work optimally, and that’s why we need 15% of your income as tithing.

They dropped an Acme-brand anvil on Zaslav’s head, to be clear.

At first, it seems like the new Garfield movie is doing something genuinely radical: making Garfield cute.

Seriously, it only takes a couple clicks to get it on The Pirate Bay.

He’s like Steve Jobs but for idiots. What would even be worth saying about the guy?

...even people who you might reasonably expect to be preoccupied by other things, like Alec Baldwin

Back to work, ya lousy actors! *cracks whip*

Creed is a good point, actually. Star Wars well... they’ve been hammering out sequels of one type or another for so long (including books, video games, etc.) that I’m not really sure what would even count as “legacy.”