My real body is naked and lumpy and strange and I’m fine with it.

Waitwaitwait.....silver velvet high-quality leggings?

I wear Spanx while giving engineering lectures to all-male audiences. I find the squeeeziness to be really comfortable, and it keeps my posture good during long lectures. I wear corsets for ballroom dance, because it looks good, and if I don’t, I get crippling back pain after an hour.

Perhaps a little on the edgier side, SF has a bondage-themed coffee shop. http://www.wickedgrounds.com/

I think I’ll call it “Broken Spectacles” (in honor of the Tilted Kilt pub chain)

Your waiter quietly mutters “can i....can i get you a coffee?” in an accent slightly British, and slightly continental. Your eyes make contact, just a little too long, but then his glasses flash, as he turns away and blushes. He brings you your latte, there is a single heart drawn in foam on it.

Gods bless Emeryville. I used to work there.

Is there a tree or a person over the age of 30 in the background?

They do say "brains"... but their beaks are stuffed with delicious sheepflesh, so it's a bit muffled.

No one's ever gotten close enough to check for a heartbeat....AND LIVED.

Not New Zealand! They have aggressive parrots that eat the livers out of living sheep!

What was it with the 80s and being really uncomfortably into sexy mannequins?

Human activities which are natural, yet do not result in conception:

Potoo now, potoo forever.

My first thought was, I want that as a shirt.

http://www.crystalcodepalace.com/

I've never seen jersey looking that elegant.

The only American abortion is to have the baby, and then leave it in a national forest to be carried away by bald eagles.

I got the women in science set for Christmas and am 32. Appropriate for all ages!

Wait, some proposals come with chocolate cake? I am rapidly revising my stance on marriage!