I just heard my senator, Dick Durbin, on MSNBC. Apparently Sen. Warren, with her popularity and articulateness (is that a word?) gets under the Repubs skin like no one else in the senate. So it was personal.

He could have been Secretary of State

He makes Dubya look like a fucking Rhodes scholar. This is the same Dubya who didn’t know how to put on his rain poncho at the inauguration.

okay, now we NEED Rosie to play Bannon...

So..... SNL is going to have all the Trump people played by someone of the opposite sex now, right? I’d pay to see Leslie Jones as Ben Carson. Or Aidy Bryant as Steve Bannon.

The best uniforms. Look I’m not going to say they need to be required to wear cute uniforms. Should I say it, no I won’t say it. I will say uggos won’t be allowed to wear them. I’m doing them a favor believe me.

Thank god! There’s never any men to speak for us, to really know what we want, you know?

Women in the workplace need less pay, less flexibility, and pink uniforms. Next question.

Doug McMillon, the chief executive of Wal-Mart

As a woman I’d argue these two dudes are perhaps... not the best fit for this role? But then again, I’m a woman—what do I know?

What’s even more bizarre about this is that Fredrick Douglass is one of like, 6 black people who you learn about in public school (along with Harriet Tubman, Rosa Parks, MLK, Chrispus Attucks and Dred Scott). Most 8th graders could probably tell you that Douglass isn’t exactly a contemporary figure.

“Frederick Dougie Fresh, a terrific guy. One of the best.”

“Thanks, but I don’t need any abortions.”

“We’re stronger when you shut the fuck up and do what I tell you.”

“I want to unite everybody because as a team we’re stronger together.”

You’d think he’d know this by now. He’s had three weddings.

Nah, you should laugh at this white supremacist who keeps stealing from a much classier black man. How embarrassing!

Nah, she donated the proceeds to people Trump want to hurt. That’s apology enough.

“Great, only three inches of the cake is usable, too?”

What is it with conservatives that they keep using songs that either don’t mean what they think they mean (Born in the USA) or have some overall theme that makes its use in their context just bizarre (My Way is NOT the kind of song you sing when you START A NEW JOB FFS).