My uncle works for Nintendo.

Well I am the Count of Monte Cristo.

Of all the people in the world to pretend to be, you pretend to be the creator of a fan mod.

So wait, you can just show up and claim you’re somebody else and all these people believe you immediately?

One of his go to moves is the belly slide, he’s chafed smooth.

Nipples? That’s burying the lede. Waxing. TONS. OF. WAXING.

Actually the jerk spot becomes an independent coffee house, where a cup of black coffee costs 7.00 because part of their pre roasting process involves going  to africa and kidnapping a small animal and force feeding it coffee beans all day, but it can’t really digest the beans, so when they animal shits out the beans…

yes, and welcome to the internet.

Seems like you haven’t been there lately.

Her love kills, just ask Michael Clark Duncan.

He’ll kick Kelly to the curb sooner or later. All it takes is one article lauding Kelly’s success in controlling the incompetent and erratic Trump, and suddenly it’s “nuh-uh! Nobody tells ME what to do!” And he’s gone.

Yeah, it’s called an MMO. Nothing you do matters, no matter how far you push you will find yourself back at the at the same ground level as everyone else when an expansion comes out and the only guaranteed outcome of all of your hours, days, weeks, or years dedicated to the game is that eventually the game will shut…

They have similar goals. One has you pushing a rock up a hill. The other has you going to the doc for a pill.

the gig economy claims another, smh

Mario is a .... Hipster!?

I’ve had a lot of beers with a lot of people, none of whom I’d want to be president.

This is what you get when you vote for people you can imagine having a beer with.

As a Texas native I think can weigh in on his thought process.

Up here in Canada, we would have said take oot.

So the takeaway is that they changed it, got it